It's In The Cards

 Continuing week one of the April A to Z Blog Challenge...

Day 3-C is for Cards and Letters 

Do you write letters? Did you write letters once upon a time? I confess to still loving pretty stationery, a good pen that writes just so, and seeing an envelope in my mailbox that is clearly personal. If you send me a card I will open it, read it, admire the design, and display it for at least a few days on the mantle or kitchen island. 

I have a hard time throwing a card in the trash, but of course I can't keep them all. I do have a collection of some whose words are extra sweet stashed in my closet. I looked through them recently, but could part with none. 

When each of my girls were born I put the cards I was sent in a scrapbook, which sounds a little over the top, except when I flip through that now I'm glad I saved them. I see the words written inside, and remember the prayers of so many family friends who knew me as a child, who watched me grow to become a mother myself, and the memory of these godly women is a treasure. 

In a convenient but unplanned turn of events, hubs and I finally tackled the great attic clean out of 2024 2025 2026 this week, and came upon some cards and letters I'd written him when we were dating. There was my young angsty heart laid bare in ink on slightly yellowed stationery. 

A stamp in 1980 was just 15¢, and that's the sort of time capsule you won't get from a deleted email. 

We started dating towards the end of a spring semester, then spent that summer apart so we wrote letters. How fun to read what my 20-year old self was thinking and feeling in the earliest days of our getting to know one another. 

Four pages front AND back...

I was not dramatic at all. Ha!  

I think about the world today and how communication is instantaneous and mostly brief. Texts, emails, messages sent via the miracle of technology and all that jazz. On one level this is wonderful, but I can't help but think we've lost something too. 

Something precious and worth keeping. 

There's a thoughtfulness to the act of letter writing that is mostly missing from an email. How often do you save and re-read an email time and time again, years apart even? An email goes into your digital trash can. A card or letter from someone who loves you, who appreciates you and tells. you why, who encourages you and lets you know you're thought of, well that is at the very least a day brightener and most often it's something more. 

A keepsake to hold on to in a disposable world. 

Share Your Shelf-October

It's the first Thursday of the month which means it's time to share what we've read the month prior. I've included a couple that carried over from September since I dropped the proverbial blog ball back then due to travel. 

This post is linked with Share Your Shelf hosted by Marilyn, Jennifer, Joanne, and Tanya. 

October was a pretty typical month for me...a couple of mysteries, fiction, a memoir, and historical fiction. I listened to to two of these books on Audible, and read the rest the old fashioned way aka actual books from the library. Here we go-

1.  The Covenant of Water by Abraham Verghese 

My goodness. I want to start by saying Abraham Verghese is an absolute masterful storyteller. Truly gifted. This book is over 700 pages long, which I know has some of you shaking your head and scrolling on by, but it's so good. Sooo good. The story flows. 

I listened to this one on Audible and I think that helped a lot with the Indian food-location-and people names. Plus the author narrates this one himself, and he has the most beautiful voice. I strongly encourage Audible here. As a side note- Abraham Verghese is an actual M.D., vice-chair for the Theory and Practice of Medicine at Stanford, and yet he somehow cranked out a 700+ page beauty of a book. 

As I said in my Hodgepodge a couple of weeks ago...I could use a bit more self discipline. 

The novel begins in 1900 and finally wraps up 80 some chapters later in 1977. Like I said though, don't let the length dissuade you. Set in Kerala India it follows three generations of a family with a mysterious drowning 'curse'. In each generation at least one family member dies by drowning. The story begins with a 12-year old girl from the Christian community in Kerala being sent by boat to her wedding. She will meet her 40-year old husband for the first time and honestly I don't want to say much more. She goes on to live a life of great love, great loss, great hardship and great joy. 

It's literally epic in scope and the exceptional changes she witnesses in her life are expertly woven into the story. There are new characters introduced along the way, yet I was never confused about the timeline or plot. It's just extraordinary. 

Easily 5 stars for me. 

2. The Heiress by Rachel Hawkins

This was just okay for me. When Ruby Kenmore dies she's North Carolina's richest woman. She's notorious too as the victim of a famous kidnapping when she was a child, and then a widow four times over. Upon her death her large estate passes to her adopted son Camden who wants nothing to do with the house or money. 

Cam has rejected his inheritance and is working in Colorado as an English teacher, married to his wife Jules. Upon his uncle's death he's more or less forced to return to Ashby House and face the family and his past. Jules pushes him to lay claim to all that Ruby wanted for him, but her plans to make this happen are not as straightforward as they first seem.

I gave it three stars. 

3. The Housemaid by Frieda McFadden

This was our book club's October selection and was a quick read. Another book I thought was overhyped and completely unbelievable in spots, but it did keep me reading so there's that. The Housemaid is currently being turned into a feature film and I rarely say this, but I think it might make a better movie than book.  

The story revolves around a wealthy married couple, Nina and Andrew, and their newly hired housekeeper Millie, a recent parolee who is homeless and in desperate need of a job. Things quickly take a turn for the bizarre with Nina's unpredictable and erratic behavior and Millie's discovery that her own attic bedroom  locks from the outside. 

The book had a Gone Girl feel for me in that you go back and forth as to who you think might actually be crazy, guilty, victim or perpetrator. Three stars for me. 

4. It Wasn't Roaring It Was Weeping by Lisa-Jo Baker 

Lisa-Jo Baker was one of the first bloggers I followed when I started my own blog. I was drawn to her warm, honest writing, and her interesting background as a white child born in South Africa who grew up at the heart of Apartheid. She was trained as a lawyer, married an American, and currently makes her home with said husband and their three children in the D.C. suburbs. 

She's written extensively on motherhood, faith, and a life lived with a foot in two continents. I've continued to follow her on social media platforms and enjoy her warmth and skill with the written word. This is her memoir. 

Her story of growing up in an angry land with a well educated but often angry father, and how that anger seeped in to her own parenting. In her memoir she shares how she's made peace with her homeland's history and her own 'home' history too. Her father is a physician, still living, and she writes this book with his blessing. 

It's a story filled with raw emotion, and Lisa-Jo writes with great tenderness of God's grace, so evident in the healing of relationships, past hurts, and her family story.  I bought the book and would be glad to share if someone wants me to send it their way. If that's you, message me. 

5.  Lady Tan's Circle of Women by Lisa See

Lisa See is one of my favorite authors. I don't think I've read a single book of hers that I haven't enjoyed, and this was no exception. This particular novel is set in 15th century China, and as you read you'll find yourself feeling grateful to have been born several centuries later. I always learn a lot about Chinese culture, history, and tradition when I read her books, and that was true in this instance too. Her fictional characters are so well drawn and you easily connect. 

Lady Tan's Circle of Women is a work of historical fiction based on the true story of Tan Yunxian, one of China's first female physicians. Yunxian is an upper-class woman, and is trained in Chinese medicine by her grandmother. When she's sent into an arranged marriage her new mother-in-law forbids her from seeing her childhood friend (from a lesser background, but also practicing in the field of medicine), or from helping the women in her new household by using her medical knowledge and skill. 

We see painful class distinctions as stories of female characters from poorer backgrounds are woven throughout. The power of female friendships, breaking with tradition, and women helping one another are at the heart of this story. 5 stars for me. 

6. Special Circumstances (Mike Daley #1) by Sheldon Siegel 

Mike Daley is a former priest, a former public defender, and in the first few pages you learn is now also a former partner in a prestigious California law firm. When his best friend and former colleague is accused of a brutal double murder Mike is hired to defend him and the story takes off from there. 

This was definitely a page turner. Hubs and I listened to this one on Audible while on a road trip and we had varying ideas as to the guilt or innocence of the accused as the story went along. A very enjoyable legal thriller and I'd read more featuring the Mike Daley character. I gave it 4 stars. 

Have you read anything good lately? If so, please share! 

Friday Favorites Ho Ho Ho

I had every intention of blogging yesterday, but that didn't happen. About a million little things happened instead and that's life sometimes. I've been itching to write about something more than weekend happenings and home improvement but that requires a clearer head than I have at the moment, so a lot about a little it is.

1. Our backyard project. The project itself is not my favorite thing, but I know the end result will be. Once the barge issue was resolved things got rolling. The guys doing the work have laid plywood down one side of the driveway to move equipment from the front yard to the back and so far so good. 

I mean it's a lot for them because the project involves a lot of heavy rock, but they're not complaining and made a good start this week. I keep them supplied with water, gatorade, and a big tub of snacks because that's what I know. 

I was part of the original planning of the project, hubs and I together met with the construction manager, saw the plans and the budget blah, blah, blah but you know how these things go. Or maybe you don't, but how it goes is quite often a new decision needs to be made on the spot, and why does that only happen when hubs is out??? 

He's sticking close to home for the most part, but had two appointments yesterday so naturally the guys wanted me to make sure they had all the pieces in the correct spot, correct height, correct everything. Huh? 

I know from my description this doesn't sound much like a favorite but honestly it is. Forward motion is good. 

2. As if all of the above were not enough, I've had painters at my house two full days this week, and they'll be back on Monday to finish up the guest suite bathroom. It's a big change in terms of color and I absolutely love it. This room has needed zhuzzing for a long while now, and I'm so happy it's finally getting zhuzzed. I will post pictures when it's finished and I have the artwork back from the framer. 

The decorator hung out here most of the morning while they worked and by the time the painters were wrapping up I'd gotten her advice on a very long list of things I'd like to do here. 

3. Next up is this post my daughter wrote. I love it so much-

Our New Normal

4. Morning coffee. We normally have our coffee on the upstairs deck, but the early morning weather has been so nice this week that we sat right here with our coffee instead. 

5. Christmas shopping. 

No haters please. I'm not an early shopper under normal circumstances, in fact I'm pretty much a December shopper, but I'm trying to get myself in gear so I can take gifts for my grands (and their mom and dad too) when we visit in the not too distant future. Congratulating myself for ordering all the jammies in August. Whoohoo!

Linking today with Friday Favorites hosted by Andrea and Erika....Merry Christmas and happy weekend everyone! 

Fresh Ink

Hello Monday morning afternoon evening. Did I take advantage of the weekend and write ahead a post or two for the April A-Z Challenge?

No I did not.

I spent the weekend out of town with friends celebrating a birthday (not my own), arriving home Sunday afternoon in time for a nap on the couch and the end of the Masters. What that means is we're winging it here today. 

I actually don't mind winging it. Sometimes those are my best posts. 
But probably not this one because letter I is tricky. 

Day 9-I is for Ink

I like the written word. 

I like reading and I like writing. I love blogging, poetry, historical accounts, smart writers, funny writers, travel writers, and especially writers who capture the bittersweet moments of life using tender words I wish I'd written myself. 

I know blogging is a bit passe in the year 2022, but I still enjoy it... still need some place to dump all the words in my head and still love recording life as it happens or viewing it through the technicolor lens of hindsight.

Writing about life has taught me to notice life. Time speeds up with every turn of the calendar page and sometimes we forget to pay attention.

I like to pay attention. 

The written word. Ink. One of my favorite things. 

Five Minutes Of Determine

Trying my hand at Five Minute Friday today, a weekly link up hosted by Kate Motaung. She posts a one word prompt and we write for five minutes flat, no editing or overthinking, ahem. 

Today's prompt-determine

I was thinking about my dad this week, specifically about the year he died. Hubs and I were living about two hours north of my parents back then and our girls were toddlers. I was in a Bible Study that year, with a group of women from my church, and I had so many questions about the particular book we were using as one of our resources. 

My dad wasn't a big talker but I would call home every week and ask his take on the theology presented in whatever chapter had been discussed that Tuesday morning. Was it right or off base? Does it line up with what I've always believed and if not help me understand. Explain it to me. Tell me what you think it means. 

A small sweet memory that stays mostly tucked into the corner of my head and heart. 

My dad died young, only a few years older than I am right now. When I saw today's word I thought of the verse in Job (14:5) that says, -"A person's days are determined; you have decreed the number of his months and have set limits he cannot exceed." 

Or as the Living Translation puts it-""You have decided the length of our lives. You know how many months we will live, and we are not given a minute longer." 

God determines my days. He decides. A lot or a little. The amount doesn't always make sense to my human mind, but I know He doesn't make mistakes. That His ways are higher than mine. That while He's given me some number of days, I determine how they're filled. 

Nearly 30 years have come and gone since we last hung up the phone. The world has grown and groaned and turned into something he probably wouldn't recognize in 2022. I've grown too, partly due to the wisdom that comes with aging, but also in large part due to study. Years and years of reading and asking questions and holding everything up next to God's word to see if it fits. 

How I'd love an icy cold Birch Beer and a chat with my dad today, about the deep and mysterious workings of God. 

Quiet Spaces and Everyday Graces

This blog has felt a bit quiet in terms of content lately, which is why I signed up for the five-day #hopewriterlife challenge. Ironically, the first word prompt is 'quiet'. 

Hmmm. 

It's never really quiet here. Our calendars are full and usually our guest rooms too, so I'm always looking for blank space somewhere. After a whirlwind August, a whirlwind summer actually, we were forced into a period of rest and stillness by hubs aching back and our dog's emergency belly surgery. 

I don't believe God sent hubs back out of whack or caused the dog to eat that mysterious bit of foam he attempted unsuccessfully to digest, but I do think He uses these types of things to slow us down, to remind us rest is good for the body and soul, and that we need times of quiet to process all the noise of this world. 

Sometimes it feels like there's no escaping the noise, but there's certainly no escaping it when you never remove yourself from it. I have a lot of thoughts, hubs might say too many-ha! and writing has always been a way for me to focus all those thoughts into something that makes sense. 

There are days where not a lot happens here. Most days I'd venture to say, and I imagine most of you would say the same. Life is much more a series of small moments rather than big events, less earth shattering happenings, more laundry and to-do lists. While writing about the everyday ordinary may seem frivolous given the times in which we live, ordinary is nearly always where I land. 

When I write I like to imagine my grandchildren reading my words decades down the road. What do I want them to know about me? What do my words say about the person their grandmother was in the middle of an all CAPS-exclamation point world?

I want them to know my hand was always reaching for the volume, turning it down as I floated into the bright blue beauty of a September day. That I saw mountains meeting clouds and felt small as I remembered where my help comes from. 

That I never stopped looking for quiet spaces in a too noisy world. That contentment lives there, in the most ordinary of days.   

Happy New You!

We're only halfway through January so not too late, right? It never feels like a brand new year to me until somewhere around January 5th or 6th anyway. This year I'm still waiting. Still sipping tea, reading books, and finishing a jigsaw puzzle instead of tackling my 30 day home organization plan I was going to start two weeks ago. Not feeling guilty about it either.

Not too guilty anyway.

My grandson likes to wish us a happy new year when we Facetime, only he says Happy New You!  and it's completely adorable. Will there be a new me this year? I always have high hopes as January 1 approaches that there will indeed be a 'new me' in the coming year. An improved version of the old me, someone with grand plans to do all the things who then actually does them, but I think this year I'll be content with doing a few small things well.

Last year I made a list of 19 things to accomplish in 2019 (read it here) and it was a little depressing to look back and see I only managed to complete six of the nineteen. To be honest number one not happening threw us all for a loop in a hundred different ways and while I may not have done all nineteen I did a number of things that didn't make the list.

Giving myself a high five and leaving 2019 in 2019.

Have I mentioned my birthday? Hubs would say not so far today but the day's not over. Ha! I have a big birthday this year (months from now, but whatever) and I'm feeling some imaginary added sense of pressure to make every minute count. I read the most fabulous thing a gentleman shared online recently about how his 64 year old mother in law revealed to the family at Christmas that she'd spent the past year learning to play the fiddle and then she played (beautifully) a dozen songs without looking at the sheet music.

No one had any idea and they all were completely gobsmacked, it was something she'd always wanted to do so she did it. Keeping it a secret made it all the more special and while I don't want to play the fiddle I do want to think about what it is I've always wanted to do and then do it.

Let's go ahead and make a new list. I'm not going to get bogged down right now in the 'how to make it all happen', but we're sixteen days into the new year and I gotta start somewhere. Here we go-

20 in 20-

chase a dream
pray more
go somewhere I've never been
exercise
write letters
read books
be good to my skin
listen more than I talk
help somebody every chance I get
laugh a lot
clean up my phone
my closet
my desk
see waterfalls
our state capital
nearby historic sites
make some homemade gifts
try some new recipes
write stuff here
leave it in His hands

Happy New You everyone...may 2020 you be the best you yet!

A Bunch of Stuff

More like nothing at all but a bunch of stuff sounds a little bit interesting and nothing at all sounds quite the opposite.

Truth be told there are gobs of things I need and want to write about, just not quite yet.

I hate it when bloggers say they have something to tell and then don't tell, but I have a number of things to tell and I'm not telling. Not today anyway, but soon.

I won't say as soon as life settles down because y'all, life just does not seem to ever settle down round here.

Delight! That's my word for this year and I'm hanging on to it by my fingernails. I'm so grateful for my bracelet (read about it here) because I need the visual reminder these days to delight in all the things. I'm not successful every minute of every day, but catching a glimpse of that bracelet on my arm helps a lot.

So does sunshine, which I'm not gonna lie has been in short supply this winter. Yesterday though? Yesterday was glorious and we took advantage of the blue sky-warm air combo and enjoyed a boat ride courtesy of our neighbors. Look no socks!

Temps were in the 60's, we had blankets for our laps, and the sun felt wonderful.

Our boat is at the boat repair place (probably not the official name but whatever) because somehow we wrapped up last year's boating season with a nice little scratch on one side and wanted that fixed before this season launches. We think the scratch happened while docked at a local restaurant but we're not sure. We are sure it wasn't my fault and really that's what matters.

Hubs and I have been volunteering with a local elementary school's water safety program which means every Wednesday afternoon we get in the pool with third grade students and teach basic swimming strokes and general water safety.  There are lots of adult volunteers so we each only have a couple of kids. There's also a lifeguard on duty and I asked last week if she'd ever had to whistle at an instructor. Not yet she hasn't. Ha!

In wedding related news I picked up the bridal gown and my gown and the bride's rehearsal dinner dress from the alterations place last week which was exciting. There are still a lot of little details to be managed but in terms of our wardrobe we're ready. Also, here's a little wedding planning tip-

Use a colored envelope for your replies. So much fun opening the mailbox and seeing all that dusty blue.

Earlier this week I signed up for the April A-Z blog challenge. Kind of on a whim which, let's be honest, is how I always end up signing up for the A-Z.  Somehow this works for me. I do have an idea for a theme this go-round, I just need to find make time to write.

I think to be a good blogger you need to blog several days a week and set your posts to publish first thing in the morning. But here I am ten years in, still blogging when the mood strikes and the planets align, hitting publish on a Wednesday when I should be making dinner.

You know what they say..."If it ain't broke, don't fix it".

Not Boring. Just Uneventful.

This morning hubs said, 'I thought you were doing some kind of 31 days of writing' thing? Um, yes?
In my defense I have been (mostly) keeping up with the 500 words a day goal, but I don't post all the days on my blog. Some of the words are in my journal, and while I'm pretty much an open book on my blog there are still a few thoughts I keep to myself.

My blog has always been a window into everyday ordinary life, and sometimes everyday ordinary life isn't all that interesting. Not boring exactly, just uneventful. January is typically queen of the ordinary-uneventful.

It's been gray, rainy, and cold here all weekend long so I've made it my goal not to leave the house unless I have to. We sit by the fire and watch the football playoffs and read and nap and before you know it Monday has rolled around. We're busy people and I love the recharge January allows.

Books I'm reading this month are The Extraodinary Life of Sam Hell by Robert Dugoni, A Ladder To The Sky by John Boyne, and Leonardo da Vinci by Walter Isaacson. That last one may take more than a month because it's 600 pages of non-fiction and not something I'll breeze through.

Daughter2 is in the house and she's on a whole clean eating-I'm getting married in 102 days-regimen so we're all playing along. I ran into someone the other day who had seen my hubs and said he told her we were all on a diet. Ha! No we're not. Unless not eating junk is called a diet? We've been trying lots of new recipes which I think fall under the heading of whole foods, but honestly there's so much food vocabulary now it's hard to know for sure what anyone is talking about.

I have not completely cut out the sugar-caffeine-dairy-wine-gluten like my daughter has on this 30 day 'detox' (she gets her willpower from her father, her love of baking comes from me), but I have dramatically reduced all of the above. Caffeine is the easiest as I generally only have coffee in the morning. Sugar and dairy are the hardest but I'm aiming for less not none and I can tell already it's been so good for me.

Daughter2 is part of a group in conjunction with the challenge so she gets recipes sent to her at the beginning of every week for the four weeks. We go through them together and pick the ones that sound good and that we can feed the men without them asking 'where's the beef?! We usually do one beef dish each week, but most recipes involve chicken, turkey, or are vegetarian.

Confession- I have never been a fan of ground turkey. I am learning to like it and we've had a couple of recipes that were keepers so I guess you're never too old. Confession-I have tried but I cannot get on the kale bandwagon. That being said, we absolutely loved this Tuscan Bean Soup, which contains no turkey, but does call for kale (we subbed spinach which is so much tastier) and I will definitely make it again. The recipe found here is close to the one we used, but we added a tsp of black pepper, and skipped the Parmesan rind. I'm sure that would have made it even more delicious but was great without too.

This is all riveting stuff isn't it?

The 31 Days of Writing comes with prompts which I've mostly neglected in favor of writing these newsy posts you've been reading, but tomorrow I think I'll tackle one we've been given. Rest assured the prompts have nothing to do with my naps or dinner plans.

Now I'm off to make a big pot of chili for dinner. With ground turkey because there's a wedding happening in 102 days.

Happy Monday!

Starting The Year Off Write

On a whim I've signed up for a 31 Day writing challenge because that's how I seem to fly here. By the seat of my pants. I also tend to overthink absolutely everything, but new year new me. Maybe? Actually what happened was I was busy yesterday and didn't have a lot of time for overthinking so I just quickly said yes to the email invitation and also to joining the accompanying writers support group.

I'm supposed to write 500 words a day for the next 31 days. Blogging counts but I rarely do a word count there. Pretty sure there's never a deficit-ha! When I put yesterday's post into a counter I was at 757 words so on track. If I complete the challenge I'll have written over 15, 000 words this month which is a lot even for me.

In staying on point here I don't have any real idea what I'm going to write about. Well maybe a small idea for something that's been pinging around my brain for a while, but really I'm pretty much in free fall.

How many words is this?

188.

See, this is why I can't overthink.

One other requirement of the challenge is to tell people you're participating and to share your writing somewhere somehow. Consider yourselves told. And since I already overshare on my blog I think I can check that second item off the list too.

Now will I share what I'm writing outside of my blog?  I hope so. I'm a bit chicken and also a bit lazy but new year new me, right?

How many words is it now?

273.

Whew, today is hard.
I think maybe I shouldn't count words and I should just write.

I used to get up really early and write. Hubs would leave for work and I'd settle in at the computer and that worked for me. Once he retired I let that early morning commitment slide, and while it frustrated me I did nothing to make myself get back to it. You know what? Teachers also leave for work at the crack of dawn and my teacher daughter is in the process of moving home until her wedding. Having her here up early every single work day has allowed me to get reaquainted with my early morning self and I'm really liking that.

I know I don't have to get up with her, I mean she's in her late 20's and has worked and lived on her own for several years now, but I recognize this season as fleeting and I want to get up with her. I like to make her lunch or a hot drink for the longer commute she has now and I give her a hug and tell her to have a great day. She's not a morning person but she likes me being up with her in the pre-dawn hour, and I'm remembering how much I love the early darkness.

The gentle quiet, the space to think and write and plan.

How everything feels possible and the world is full of hope.

Capture

Still at that 31 Day Writing Challenge....

Today's prompt-capture

I went ahead and skipped yesterday's prompt because the word was 'brief'. Y'all I wouldn't even know where to begin-ha! Today's one word prompt is capture and since I've been meaning to come back here and 'capture' my thirties in a blog post this works.

Back when I hosted the weekly Wednesday Hodgepodge I asked people to describe their 20's in one sentence, and then later to do the same for their 30's. Since one sentence is never enough for me I wrote a whole post about my 20's (here). I wanted to do the same for my 30's and today is going to be that day.

So, it's been a while. What do I remember about my thirties? How does that decade look from a vantage point some twenty years down the road?

I turned thirty just a few days after giving birth to my second daughter. If you'd asked me then I'd have said I felt every bit my age and then some. Baby girl was an absolute beauty and she loved her mama so much she did not ever ever ever want me too far from reach. She sleeps like it's her job now, but those early months were sort of a par-tay whoop whoop all night long.

And I was tired for the first half of my thirties.

You know there's a very short window in motherhood where you actually get to sleep the way you want to sleep and not the way your children dictate you sleep. That window opens up about the time your children are between the ages of 5 and 15. For the rest of your parental life sleep will be interrupted either by babies needing to be fed, changed and soothed, toddlers needing water or the potty or to climb in bed with mom for no reason at all, or by teenagers who drive cars and college students living just out of reach. Then all of a sudden they're all grown up and sure you could sleep if only your own body would let you.

Actually I think I might make this two posts because life is chock-a-block full of experiences, feelings, and lessons learned in your thirties. We'll do the first five years today, and somehow I'll make the second five fit tomorrow's prompt. Or Monday's prompt. Or sometime.

When my thirties began we were living in a tiny little town in the far northern tip of NJ. Hubs had a brutal commute to work and on top of that was traveling a ridiculous amount of the time so sometimes it felt like I was living there and he was living at the office or Newark Airport. Almost weekly a car service would show up at our door at 3 am so he could make a 6 am flight or some such nonsense and hey, no wonder we were tired.

We were involved in a church in a nearby town and it was here I attended my first Women's Bible Study group. The women in that group were a Godsend to me in those early exhausting days of parenting. My faith grew here by leaps and bounds, and the love and support I felt from these women helped me navigate one of the hardest seasons of my life, the loss of my dad.

I don't think we have any idea how the loss of a parent will shape and change us in the years to come, but it does. My dad enjoyed his grandchildren so much and all these years later I still feel sad that he didn't get to watch them grow up or know them as the enchanting young adults they are today. He left a legacy of faith and courage though and these are gifts you treasure with an ever deepening sense of gratitude as the years roll by.

Daughter1 turned three years old and after a scary episode of mono ended she was finally able to start preschool. Every Tuesday and Thursday we moms would linger in the hallway as we dropped our littles off for class. Then we'd all kind of shuffle off alone to our own homes and repeat the ritual at pickup. I became friendly with one of the moms because our daughters had latched on to one another from the word GO, and she and I decided together we'd organize an informal coffee morning.

So we invited all the moms to come to my house the next week for coffee and cake while our preschoolers were in school. Most of us had a toddler or a babe in arms too, so everyone came and brought their babies and it was the beginning of a wonderful weekly play group/mom support system that carried on through Daughter 1's kindergarten year which is when we moved.

We moved in my thirties. Nobody's surprised are they? More about that in the second half of the decade writeup, because today I'm remembering what it felt like to be 32.

To have babies who fit in the crook of my arm and who snuggled up close on the couch.

There was that time a bear got in the garage, the wonky steel swingset perched somewhat precariously on the side of our back hill, the maple tree that turned the prettiest shade of red I've ever seen.

There were birthday parties on the brick patio, bicycles with training wheels, and home made ice cream.

Fourteen country miles to the nearest McDonalds, three trips to the ER for stitches (hello Daughter2!), weekend walks through apple orchards, the A.T. trail, Central Park and Waywayanda.

A pacifier smile, the silky edge of a well loved blankie, the color pink.

Blonde curls and books and freshly bathed girls.

A full day. A full life. A full heart.

Share

Back for more of the 31 Day Write Challenge using the Five Minute Friday prompts (found here). Since today is an actual Friday our prompt was a surprise. Also on Fridays we stick to the 'exactly five minutes of writing' rule, so here we go-

Today's prompt-share

I know the theme of this month's Five Minute Free Write is 31 Days to Telling Your Story, but when I read the word the first thing that came to mind was my sister. We're a year apart and she's the one who taught me to share. Forced me to share?

We shared a bedroom, clothes, friends, secrets, my mother's attention, and the third seat in the family station wagon. We giggled, we fought, we compromised. We gave and we took. We teased and consoled. We tormented and loved. We were different in a thousand ways, yet the same in a thousand more. We argued, we forgave, and we grew. Sharing is caring or so the saying goes, and I agree it is that. It's also hard, sacrificial, and quite often easier said than done.

Sometimes when I write here I become so aware of what I'm thankful for. Today it's my family. For parents who led by example. Who loved us and taught us to share.

For my siblings. My people. My real life ensemble cast.

The ones with the magic and memory of our shared childhood story written on their hearts the way it's written on mine.

What's Your Story?

Well. It has been a long time since I've been here. Long time in the blog world, but I guess only two weeks in real time. For those of you who don't know, the blog world is like dog years where a single day equals something like a hundred. All that to say it feels like this little corner needs a good dusting, and since I'm feeling a lot out of sync with my words I'm going to jump back in with a 31-day writing party.

Go big or go home, right?

Every October there's something on the Internet called the Write 31 Days Challenge, where writers pick a topic and write one post on that topic every day of the month. (you'll find details here). In conjunction with that Kate Motaung (host of Five Minute Friday) will be posting 31 days of five minute free write prompts to help motivate and inspire us to stay the course. Her theme? 31 Days to Telling Your Story...because we all have one.

I'll just say right off the bat, mine will be more like a 20-day writing party because I know me and I know my calendar. Case in point it's October 2nd so I'm already a day behind. Or right on track if I aim for 20 so 20 it is. Some of my posts will be true five-minute entries, some will be more. I'm giving anyone who wants to try it permission to do the same.

Today's one word prompt-story

What's my story? I'm not so sure these days. This middle age thing is trickier to navigate than I had anticipated. Question-am I still middle aged?

I'm going to say yes. The first half of our lives are pretty well defined, or at least mine was. College-work-marriage-work-babies-work-volunteer-teenagers-volunteer-launch young adults out into the world-now what?

Yes, now what?

Technically we fall into the 'retired' category except we're young. Ish. Young to be retired anyway. Too young. Life is flying by and I just want to hit the pause button for a minute while we catch our breath and take stock of where we are and where we've been and where in the world we're going.

Have you ever read a book and somewhere in the middle lost sight of how the main character arrived in the place they are now? When you do it helps to go back and re-read earlier chapters in order to make sense of the present.

Stories are composed of five different elements-setting, character, plot, conflict, and theme. A good author weaves these elements together in ways the reader might not have anticipated. He keeps the story moving forward until the very last page. While I too often want to be the sole author of my own story I can read back through earlier chapters and find myself there.  Not as the author, but as the main character in a story not yet finished.

God is writing my story in ways I cannot predict but know I can trust. He has plunked me down in settings too numerous to mention, peopled the plot with characters and conflict and an overarching theme of His amazing grace.

With every turn of the page He is growing the main character into the person He created her to be.

The Winds Of Change Are Blowing Through The Hodgepodge

Hello Hodgepodgers and any others who might be reading here today. If you're a regular in the HP please be sure to read my random thought today. I'm sure nobody skips to the bottom and just adds a link ahem, but I've got HP news in my random so you'll want to at least read that.

Now on to this week's questions...if you've answered add your link at the end of my post. Be sure to hop over and leave a comment for the blogger before you too, because that's how we roll. Here we go-

1. I feel most energized when I _______________________.

Tick things off a to-do list. Accomplish a difficult or particularly annoying task I've put off.  Am fed and well rested-ha! Just keepin' it real. If I'm tired and hungry I get cranky. 

2. Where were you ten years ago?

In mid-July of 2008 I was enjoying a blue sky day in London with the hubs and our girls-

And walking our pup on the paths that ran through the fairy tale ferns in our little English village-

Note what I'm wearing on July 20, 2008!

3. July 17th is World Emoji Day. Do you use emojis? Which one's your favorite? Your most used?

I use emojis in texts, mostly just texts to my family though. My favorite is probably the smiley face blowing a kiss, but my most used is the smiley face with the heart eyes. Daughter1 says I love to add lots of heart eyes to any posted pics of baby boy. I can't help it. He gives me all the heart eyes. 

4. What song would you put on a wedding DO NOT PLAY list?

Quite a few actually, but The Macarena was the first to come to mind. 

5. What deserves less of your attention? More of your attention?

The less part of this question is hard for me right now. I have been doing all the things that need doing this summer and haven't had a lot of time to 'waste' on things that don't need my attention.

As far as more of my attention I'm going to say writing. I miss it and am trying to figure out a way to make it happen on a more regular basis. 

Which brings me to my random thought...

6. Insert your own random thought here.

Although it's not that random because I've been mulling this 'random' over for quite a while now. 

I'm going to take a break from the Wednesday Hodgepodge. I've struggled with the commitment all summer and am still looking at a very busy end of July-August calendar. But mostly it's this-

I miss writing and I want to make room for that in my life again. 

I know the Hodgepodge is writing, but it's not the only writing I want to do. And because we've had so much going on here this spring and summer it seems what little time I do have to write I've had to spend on the Wednesday Hodgepodge. 

That's not to say I don't love it, and especially the people I've come to know here, but I do need to make some adjustments and this feels like the right time to do it. 

So here's the deal...this will be the last Wednesday Hodgepodge for the summer. I will definitely host one more the first week in September for anyone who wants to participate, and then will see how I feel about continuing in the current format or maybe in an updated format. Or maybe putting a bow on it and calling it done. Stay tuned. 

In the meantime I do have plans to blog, to read blogs which is something else I've missed, and to write outside my blog.  I hope you'll add me to your reader,  follow me by email or on Instagram where I normally link. Or send me a FB friend request as I also link my blog there. You can follow along using any of these methods by clicking the links just under the Welcome section on my sidebar. 

I have truly loved this little weekly gathering. I've learned a lot and laughed a lot and I look forward to seeing what's next. Mark your calendars for Sept 4/5 if you want to be sure and catch the return of the Hodgepodge. 

Cheers! Joyce 




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The Written Word

Hodgepodgers see note here. 

I sometimes participate in a Friday link up called Five Minute Friday where we're given a one word prompt, and then we write for five unedited-unspellchecked minutes on that prompt because we love the written word and need to spill some on a weekly basis. A few months back someone in the group collected a bunch of entries that had been posted in the FMF link-up over the course of the past five years, and she put them together in a book, and that book is now available on Amazon (all proceeds benefiting The Vine School and Take Action in South Africa), and I have an essay there with my surname missing a letter, but as I said-unedited. Like this post. ahem. 

Anyway, I got a copy of the book this week and I re-read my entry (which originally appeared on my blog in September 2013) and I missed the girl who wrote it. I've been thinking about how I used to write about things I think and feel and notice and now I seem to just write about what I do, and I don't like that nearly so much. I promised myself I'd try to get reacquainted with that girl and I know there are far too many ands here, but sometimes stream of consciousness is necessary.

I've had a lot going on. Big things and hard things and family things that need tending thousands of miles away and between the house build and the things that have needed tending there's not a lot of time to write. I do have five minutes most days though so I'm going to try more five minute entries, less novel-esque tomes.

Starting tomorrow, because this one is already bordering on wordy.

I saw my daughter1 in The Evergreen State last week. It was a bit spur of the moment, but I accompanied my mom on a trip she needed to make to Arizona, and since we were already on that side of the country we said, "hey why not?". My mom hadn't seen daughter1 since daughter1's wedding in January 2015, so this sidetrip was a real bright spot in an otherwise difficult week. My mom and I then flew back to SC on Saturday which made for a grand total of five flights and some 4,478 miles but who's counting? My mom is such a trooper y'all. For real.

Also, I'm moving in something like 28 days and I tried not to think about that too much while I was on the other side of the country, because there were many, many other things to think about, but yesterday I paused for a minute and realized I'm moving in something like 28 days. I've got furniture in storage in another state, furniture we purchased in NC waiting on a delivery date, furniture we purchased in SC also waiting on a delivery date, furniture in the apartment that needs to be collected by the rental company, utilities to transfer, utilities to organize, official address changes to be made in writing to a thousand and one people and service providers, window treatments to give the go ahead to, and quite likely a few hundred other little bits and pieces I don't even know I don't know.

On Sunday evening we took our builder and his wife for a boat ride, and as we made our way back to our dock the sun dropped into the water with a glorious watercolor flourish. There were very few boats on the lake and as the sky turned from orangey pink to a deep dark indigo I let the quiet wash over me.

We are known and loved by the One who made this. The One who gives us second chances, new mercies, and beautiful sunset skies. The One who says don't worry about tomorrow.

The One who says don't worry.

On Being Present

Linking up with Five Minute Friday today. Easy peasy. Set the timer. Write. No editing, no second guessing. Just do it.

Today's prompt-present

I haven't participated in Five Minute Friday in several weeks mostly because it tends toward the deep and I've been swimming in the shallow end on my blog of late. I was scrolling through my dashboard earlier which led to the re-reading of some older posts, and I couldn't help but miss the writer I was. She's still around here somewhere, we just need to get reacquainted. I think that's where this word comes in.

As it happens I've had a post in my draft file labeled Present for some time now. The post was blank, but I'd scribbled the word down almost a month ago with every intention of someday getting back to it. And every week I'd open my dashboard, see it sitting there, and think not today.

So why then did I ever put pen to paper (or fingertips to keyboard) and spell out the word present? Here's the short version...

You know how it's kind of become a thing to have a word for the year? I've done it myself the past four years, when a particular word seemed to be everywhere I turned and felt like it had my name on it...joy, love, fearless, seek...

This year though? This year I just wasn't feeling it. I'd see people talking about their 'one word' and I'd scratch my head and say hmmm...what's going to be my word? And then nothing.

Blank space.

Empty air.

I think sometimes we force this kind of thing and I determined not to do that. Not to pluck a word out of thin air and wear it like a badge and call it mine.

We have a lot going on here at the moment, and I know if you read here you're saying 'doesn't she always???', but really, we have a lot going on here at the moment. And without over thinking it I've just let some of the online stuff go in order to be here. In the middle of my life.

Then there's the fact that recently I've become quite disillusioned with social media. Or maybe it's people I'm weary of. People spouting off and taking offense at every little thing under the sun, desperate to convince me their opinion is the right opinion. I might be late to that party, but Facebook for sure has lost some of it's appeal, both in tone and content. I started skimming more, commenting less, reading less, stepping away.

It's easier than one might think.

As I took some baby steps back it struck me that I'm often only halfway present in the present. I began mentally inventory-ing some of my habits and decided I want less multi-tasking. Less checking of the phone and more real listening. Less feeling irate and more praying. Giving less attention to the whiners and complainers in this world and filling my heart and mind with the beauty of the earth and the people I love.

Present. Really really present.

I guess that's why I left the post blank. The longer it sat the more the idea of sharing it felt almost contrary to the word itself. Contrary to why I chose it. Or did it choose me? But today I clicked on Kate Montaung's blog and Friday link up and there it was.

My word.

And I decided to write it all down because when I write I'm present in my own life. It's where I examine and resolve and remember how satisfying it is to truly be in the moment.  I want more of that this year.

January Things

You can only write so many random posts filled with un-related bits of non-essential mumbo jumbo before you run out of synonyms to use in a title. Hence the original and uninspired heading January Things. 

Let's catch up. Not a whole lot is happening around here besides the usual January not-that-interesting-but necessary-life-stuff. There's my ever optimistic post-Christmas efforts to organize the paper piles accumulated when normal life has been temporarily suspended for holiday life.

Holiday life is so much more fun, isn't it?

Also, I thought we were moving towards a paperless society? What is all this paper? I do so much 'bookkeeping' online now, but think I'm part of a generation that still feels the need for a paper backup 'just in case'.

January is also the time of year I update our calendars and book appointments with all the medical professionals a post-50 life requires. For those of you who are something less than that magical number, let me just say it creeps up on you and suddenly keeping up with your healthcare is the equivalent of a part time job.

In January I return to a stricter routine in terms of meal planning, exercise, and tackling some of my goals for the new year. My girls gave me a beginner's calligraphy set for Christmas and I can't wait to dive in. They ordered the kit complete with video how-tos,  from Laura Hooper Calligraphy, and she does absolutely gorgeous work. I've always had a thing for pretty paper and beautiful handwriting, and am anxious to learn from a professional. If you're a fan of words that look like art check her out on Instagram.

Of course January is also filled with football. You should know I have a rather complex system in place for determining team loyalty in any given game, both college and professional. Essentially it's based on where I was living when and who's who in any given match-up. For instance if the Eagles are playing the Cardinals it's simple. I grew up a Philly fan and feel no loyalty to Arizona, so Go Eagles! If on the other hand, the Ravens are playing the Broncos, well that's where things get a bit more dicey. We lived in Maryland for a number of years and naturally cheered for the Ravens.

Except we always, always root for Peyton because our number one loyalty is to the TN Vols and Peyton was a Vol before he was a horse, Colt or Bronco. Do you see my dilemma?

One of our 'rules' when it comes to college football is that we root for teams in the SEC. Now within the SEC there's a hierarchy too, with our Volunteers at the top of the heap and the Crimson Tide and/or Florida at the bottom. Still, if an SEC team is playing a non-SEC team we root for the SEC, even if that team is Bama.

Except tonite. Tonite we're rooting for Clemson because Clemson is in our backyard and we love! the coach. Go Tigers!

What else? We're finally ready to pour the foundation at the lake house, and are really hopeful it will happen this week. When I say 'we' you know I mean the professionals, right? Hubs and I will watch. Or hubs will watch and I'll go see it once it's done, because that's pretty much how I roll when it comes to this part of the home build puzzle.

January weekends often find hubs and I at the movies because it's January. What else is there to do? Last weekend we saw The Revenent, and I think I've almost recovered. It was super intense and I 'watched' most of it with my eyes closed. Even the weather in this film is stressful. Leonardo DiCaprio is always completely convincing in whatever role he plays, and this was no different.

He won the Golden Globe if you pay attention to such things. Hubs and I watched a bit of the awards show because I enjoy the fashion, but honestly we are so out of touch with the programs nominated and the actors too. I didn't know who half the people were, and hadn't heard of more than half the series mentioned. We must be old.

And on that note, I think you're caught up.
Carry on.

Hodgepodge Questions-Volume 249

Happy New Year Hodgepodgers! Thanks so much for hanging in there with me this year.  I'm looking forward to lots more fun and random in 2016...now on with the show-

Here are the questions to the last Hodgepodge of 2015. Answer on your own blog, then hop back here tomorrow to share answers with all the other revelers.

1. Share a favorite memory/moment from the week of Christmas.

2.  If someone wrote a book about your life based on the past year, what genre would it fall under? What would the title be?

3. What made you feel patriotic this year?

4. What experience from this past year would you like to do all over again?

5. What song lyric sums up or is a reflection of your 2015?

6. On a scale of 1-10 how would you rate 2015?  (10=stellar) Why?

7. What part of the upcoming year are you most excited about?

8. Insert your own random thought here.

Hot Fun In The Summertime Hodgepodge

Welcome to another edition of the Wednesday Hodgepodge. We've had a few new faces join the party in recent weeks, so welcome especially to the newbies. I don't ask a lot here, just three little things-

• Please only link if you've answered today's questions (I delete non-Hodgepodge links)
• Add a link back here so anyone visiting your blog can play along too. The button code is in my sidebar so you can easily copy and paste. 
• And finally, leave a comment for the blogger who linked before you because that's the neighborly thing to do. 

Now on with the show!

1.July 15th is National Give Something Away Day.  What can you give away? Will you?

From my vantage point mid-move I will tell you there is always something we can do without. In the past six months we've given away clothes, furniture, and assorted miscellany by the pound. I'm sure there will be plenty more once we're in our still-to-be built house, but for now I guess a smile or kind word will have to do. 

2. Do you have a mantra? Please share with the class if you feel comfortable doing so.

My mantra is simple...'Every little thing is gonna be okay.' 
Because it is. 

3. Who does the grocery shopping in your house? How many times a week do you shop? Do you make a list or pray for inspiration in the produce aisle?

I used to do all the grocery shopping, but in our temporary digs here with my mom we're all sharing the load. I'm sure once we're re-settled I'll go back to my weekly menu planning and list making. Grocery shopping is a chore I kind of enjoy. 

My preferred way is to plan meals for the week, and I definitely shop from a list, a) because I love making lists, and b) I'm over 50. Without a list you don't remember what you came for when you're over 50. Truth. 

4. Is there a TV show you're embarrassed to say you watch? You're going to tell us what it is, right?

Once upon a time I watched The Real Housewives of Orange County and later The Real Housewives of NJ. When it comes to 'reality' shows I might tune in for the early days, but I've never been a loyal fan of this sort of programming. The combination of too much yelling and ridiculously bad behavior wears me down. 

Probably my most recent embarrassment would be Sister Wives. I used to record it and watch while I ate my lunch, but once hubs retired he was not on board so I gave it up. 

I have to add as I was proofing this to publish my daughter mentioned The Bachelor/Bachelorette. I'm not watching the current season, and I didn't watch last season either, but I've seen more than a few of this one. 

5. A recent article listed fifteen words we should eliminate from our (written) vocabulary in order to sound smarter-

that, went, honestly, absolutely, very, really, amazing, always, never, literally, just, maybe, stuff, things, and irregardless

Of the fifteen, which word is your most overused?

I'm going with 'that'. When I edit my writing I find a lot of thats. Yes, believe it or not I start out with more words than you see here-ha! I try reading the sentence without the word, and 9 times out of 10 I don't need it. I know I also use the word 'just' a little too often, but I like it so will probably continue in my overuse. 

I might reduce the occurrence, but won't completely eliminate any on the list except irregardless. That word is mostly misused, and makes me twitch.  

6. So apparently dying your hair gray (in your youth!) is a thing right now. It's called 'The Granny Hair' trend. Your thoughts?

Why???? I don't get this trend at all. Perhaps if all the strands of my brunette self were brunette down to their roots, then gray would be a novelty? I have to say I don't get it, and I'm not a fan. 

7. A while back Buzz Feed asked members to share the most beautiful sentence they've read in a piece of literature. A hard thing to narrow down, at least for me, but let's try. What's one of the most beautiful sentences you've ever read in a piece of literature?

"Dear old world,' she murmured, 'you are very lovely, and I am glad to be alive in you."

~L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables

8. Insert your own random thought here.

We move into our rental in less than three weeks. Between now and then we will log over 3200 miles in the car driving south then north then south then further south. We do complicated well. Or crazy? Maybe it's crazy we do well. 

The Good Stuff

I do so wish I were better organized for this year's A-Z Challenge, but since wishing doesn't make it happen, let's just continue with the muddling through.

I mentioned a while back the box of letters I'd stumbled upon during the great basement purge of 2015. Once I found that box the purge became less of a purge and more of let's just sit here in the middle of the floor and read old mail kind of project. Hubs is all about getting a job done, so I ended up bringing the box upstairs to read at my leisure.

K is for Keepers

Every time you move you're more or less forced to decide what to hold on to and what to let go. What you can live without and what holds some sort of value, sentimental or otherwise. What's useful and what's outlived it's usefulness. When you move often, as we have done, this purging happens on a fairly regular basis. You're weary of all the packing and unpacking so you weed out most of the meaningless and are left with just the necessities to cart from pillar to post. 

The necessities and the good stuff.  

Letters from your sister written when you were a young, slightly homesick, eighteen-year-old college student are most definitely the good stuff.  

I've moved ten times since college, and these letters have followed me from one abode to another, across multiple state lines, and even for a time into the dark recesses of a storage unit while we lived across the pond. 

There's something very precious about holding a letter in your hand. A letter written about the everyday ordinary of life at home in 1978.

'...I went to the mall with Dad on Saturday. What a drag! We bought trash cans at Sears....'

'...me and mom went to the PX and Commissary. They had disgusting clothes, but I did find a pretty raincoat which mom put on layaway...'

'...today we went to the diner and the lady asked how many and I said four because I forgot you weren't there....'

I'm sure those words are fairly meaningless to you, but when I read them my heart wells up with something hard to name. Nostalgia, longing, the sweet sweet comfort of a place called home and childhood. 

I'd had a bit of a rough summer the year I went off to college, and my sister wrote me lots of letters. In most of them she begs me to write back, scolds me for my slow responses. I was all caught up in being eighteen, and while I don't remember the details, reading these letters I know I let her down. 

There's one from my mom in the box too, where she gently nudges 'write your sister' and then another saying...'you've mortally wounded her...'.

The girls in my family were not dramatic at all. 

There's a part of me that wishes now I could go back. Write her all the letters she deserved. Tell her how the stories from home made my heart feel light and safe. 

Love within a family is a powerful thing, and I handle the yellowed stationary gently. I tuck it safely back inside the box, ready for another move. 

And I sit at my computer and send an email about my ordinary everyday... 

'...hubs is painting the porch railing today....'

'...we'll be in Washington later this spring...'

'...found some letters you wrote me back in college...
they made my heart explode...they're keepers'.