Workin' the Wednesday Hodgepodge Vol 91

It seems only appropriate that answering the questions in this Labor Day Hodgepodge required a bit of work. I'm glad you joined the party today...be sure to add your link to the bottom of my post before you head out to visit the neighbors. Here are my answers~

1. Americans will celebrate Labor Day this coming weekend. Do you know what we're actually celebrating? (without consulting your friends google or wikipedia, ahem) What's a project you're currently 'laboring' over?

I do know why we celebrate and I'll spare you my thoughts here about the need and function of labor unions in the 19th century being very different from that of the 21st century. I live in NJ and unions make the news here every.single.day.

As far as projects I'm laboring over...I don't suppose you want to hear me mention my photo organization one more time do you?

Okay, how about this-we want to do some landscaping to our side hill and also need the back hill seriously pruned. We cannot seem to get a quote on the project. Recently we had a landscaper out to look at the potential work and make some drawings. I had no trouble reaching him by phone and spoke a couple of times to an actual person to book the appointment. He arrived on time, was personable and professional, and was accommodating in that he made the appointment for early evening to allow hubs time to get home from work. This landscaper came highly recommended by more than one source and said he'd get a quote to us by the weekend. That was three weeks ago. We've left countless messages and I can't imagine why he hasn't gotten back to us and is suddenly unavailable by phone. It's a little worrisome, not to mention frustrating.

2. Labor Day also signifies the unofficial end of summer for most of us...what summer food will you miss the most? If you live in the Southern hemisphere feel free to substitute winter for summer.

Watermelon and tomatoes. I love all the summer fruits but watermelon is my favorite. And mid-winter when all the tomatoes are pink and grainy I'll be wishing I could sink my teeth into a red, ripe, fresh-from-the-vine Jersey tomato.

3. A well known proverb states, "It's easier to seek forgiveness than ask permission." Your thoughts?

I'm really more of an 'ask permission' kind of girl. Plowing ahead and then worrying about making up for it later is not my style. I won't be breaking the rules unless it's a matter of life and death. Ha- I'm sure my hubs is nodding his head at the truth of that last statement.

4. Food critic, film critic, art critic, book critic...which hat would you most like to wear?

Food.

No one is surprised are they?

5. When you were a kid, (besides your parents) who was your favorite adult?

There were many but the ones who popped immediately to mind were my grandma, the young mom who lived next door, a favorite camp counselor, and the youth leaders in my church.

6. The astronaut Neil Armstrong passed away last week. He was regarded as a hero by many generations of people all around the world. Do we still have modern day heroes? What makes someone a hero?

Back in 1969 the courage it took for those astronauts to climb into that little bitty capsule is mind boggling. By all accounts Neil Armstrong was a humble man. He liked to credit the thousands of NASA workers who made his moon walk possible rather than seeking the spotlight himself. I think bravery combined with integrity and humility is the very definition of heroism.

Our society likes to hold up sports figures as heroes but I disagree. I think sports figures can potentially be role models, but what they do is in no way heroic. Nor are celebrities heroic. And while great business leaders and entrepreneurs like Steve Jobs can inspire and change the world, I wouldn't label them as heroes either.

The world needs role models and heroes both. I think a hero is someone who, with great courage, deliberately and without regard for the personal consequences, puts others before self in order to accomplish something amazing.

Firefighters and policemen rushing in to the crumbling World Trade Center buildings-heroic.

One man standing firm against the tyranny of a dictator-heroic

Navy Seals, Green Berets, and other Special Forces rescuing a fallen soldier behind enemy lines-heroic.

A pilot calmly landing a plane full of frightened passengers in the middle of the Hudson River and then stating he was only doing his job-heroic.

Bravery is an essential component of heroism. I think humility and integrity complete the package.

7. I never get tired of __________________.

...a clear , bright blue sky.

8. Insert your own random thought here.

Debby over at Just Breathe had a little musical meme on her blog last week and I told her I'd play along. The instructions were to name 15 vocalists (in no particular order) who will always stick with you...don't take too long to think about it, just the first 15 that pop into your head.

Okay, you know I'm not very good at that whole 'not thinking too hard about it' thing but here's a list of fifteen...

Steve Perry (Journey), Lou Gramm (Foreigner), Bruce Springsteen, James Taylor, Karen Carpenter, Don Henley, Bono, Martina McBride, Barry Gibb, Carole King, Phil Collins, Ann Wilson (Heart), Rob Thomas (Matchbox Twenty), and Christopher Cross.

Who would be on your list?

Questions for the Weds. Hodgepodge-Vol 91

Welcome to another edition of the Wednesday Hodgepodge. Answer the questions on your own blog and then hop back here tomorrow to link up with the other 'laborers'.

1. Americans will celebrate Labor Day this coming weekend. Do you know what we're actually celebrating? (without consulting your friends Google or wikipedia, ahem) What's a project you're currently 'laboring' over?

2. Labor Day also signals the unofficial end of summer for most of us...what summer food will you miss the most? If you're in the southern hemisphere feel free to substitute winter for summer.

3. A well known proverb states, 'It's easier to seek forgiveness than ask permission.' Your thoughts?

4. Food critic, film critic, book critic, art critic....which hat would you most like to wear?

5. When you were a kid, who (besides your parents) was your favorite adult?

6. The astronaut, Neil Armstrong, passed away last week. He was regarded as a hero by many generations of people all around the world. Do we still have modern day heroes? What makes someone a hero?

7. I never get tired of __________________.

8. Insert your own random thought here.

And now for something different here's a list...

It's Monday and it's been a while since I did a random list, other than every single Wednesday but that's different, so today I'm going with a list of things I love lately.

1.Hubs took the day off on Friday and worked in the yard, washed his car, and hit some golf balls. I went with him to the course and practiced my putting. I don't actually ever play golf but I like putting and I love driving a golf cart.

2. Oh, and the view~

The view from our neighborhood course is pretty stunning.

3. Speaking of beautiful views...it was a lovely evening weather wise so we dined Alfresco beside the lake.

Italian food and a pretty sunset...what's not to love?

4. Something else I'm loving? Instagram. If you're there send me your screen name and I'll follow your photography. I'm daleyshots.

5. We saw The Bourne Legacy on Saturday afternoon. We liked it and they definitely left an opening for a sequel. I am a fan of Jeremy Renner.

6. I love my iPhone but feel like my fingers are just a little too big for the keys. Does anyone else have that problem? When I text my girls I always sign it xoxo (don't laugh, they like it) only what I usually end up sending is coco.

7. We took the little red car out for an early morning drive on Saturday and Sunday both. Perfect convertible temps and I am loving these cooler mornings.

8. Sunday afternoon we watched hubs small town Alma mater play their longtime crosstown rival on ESPN2. They lost but it was a good game. Until the end obviously. Love the way a small town rallies round their teams.

9. I spent the rest of the afternoon tackling my photo organization. It is really hard to stay focused when I'm looking at old photos.

Just sayin'.

That's daughter2 with her mama and a favorite uncle way back when.

10. While I'm on the subject of sweet things...the little cutie pie pictured above turns 22 in a couple of weeks. Can that be right?

Yes, I guess it can because that's her on the left, smiling big and a long way from four. Still adorable though. And I won't even insert a sigh here because grown up daughters are an awful lot of fun too.

September rolls in on Saturday and in our house we brace for a month of birthdays, beginning with hubs on the first day of the month. Daughter2 will be celebrated in week2 and mine in week 3. Whoohoo! I'm spending a few days with Daughter2 on and around her birthday and there is nothing I love more than face time with my girls. I'm talking about real face time, not the fake computer kind.

11. I made these orange muffins with a citrus glaze last week and they are yummy! Light, delicious, and really moist. Next time I'll put a small bit of orange peel on top. I took them to Bunco and at first people thought they were corn muffins.

fyi-The recipe calls for one cup of milk and 1/2 cup of freshly squeezed oj. Reviewers suggested flip flopping that so I used one cup of oj and 1/2 cup of milk and the orange flavor was just right. You'll find the recipe here.

12. Because mornings on our patio have been so perfectly lovely temperature wise, hubs and I sipped our coffee there Friday, Saturday, and Sunday morning.

We love watching the hummingbirds who are much braver now about dive bombing the feeder while we're sitting close by. They are amazing little creatures.

I'll stop there because that's a nice even dozen and symmetry is required to face a Monday, don't you think?

Stream of Conciousness ala Mid-Life

It's been a long week. All week I've thought we were a day ahead of what the calendar was actually saying. I don't know why, it's quiet here so maybe it's just that. I've been catching up on paperwork, getting re-acquainted with my vacuum, booking flights for some small trips next month, nothing truly urgent or pressing in the grand scheme of things. Nothing that really has to be done today, just tasks that can be accomplished any old time. There's laundry, but not mounds. There's dust but only enough to require a quick swipe of the cloth. The dog might like a walk and the plants need a drink, but if it doesn't happen today it can happen tomorrow.

This is mid life. Pockets of furious activity and then stillness. If the girls are home or we're expecting house guests or have travel plans, then the house buzzes and so do I right along with it. I might fall into bed at night wondering where the day went. But most days are just days, blank slates waiting for me to stamp them in some form or fashion. I make schedules and lists of tasks that don't need to be scheduled or listed but I do it anyway. I don't want to turn into a slug, and in all honesty, if you're not working full time its a short slope to slug-dom in this season of life.

I've been writing and editing some things I've written with an eye to sending them off to someone somewhere. I find its best to view it as a job and set a start and stop time, even if no one is looking over my shoulder or watching the clock and measuring my performance. I'm watching the clock. When you've got kids at home, no day is wasted, not even those days where you feel like all you did was spin your wheels. You are a physical presence in the life of someone who needs your physical presence. You are building stone by stone their mental, emotional, and spiritual health with the words you say and the tone in which you say them. The words you don't say count too. Every task done and those left undone, they all matter.

With a clean quiet house it is so very easy to waste a day.

When we first moved back to the states I imagined going to work full time. The first year though was full of transition, some anticipated and some unexpected and unplanned. We spent a lot of time reconnecting in person with family and friends scattered across several states. We set up our own house along with apartments for our daughters. I was available. Available to travel with my husband and take care of getting things done here, but mostly and most importantly, I was available to spend time with my girls and my mom and siblings when hubs traveled. Relationships need nurturing and that means face time. My girls are busy. Their schedules are somewhat set and it helped that I had flexibility. We are two hours from our closest relatives and many more than that from 2/3 of our family, including our own children. If I work full time what we lose must be weighed against anything we would gain.

Time is precious. We know this, have always known it, but that truth was re-learned in a very painful way this past year. I am not quick to give up the blank slate days in exchange for something that may not be of equal value.

So how to fill all that white space that falls between the small pockets of frenzy?

Well, I don't stay in my pajamas, sleep til ten, or watch TV all afternoon. I don't eat lunch standing up, hang out in the mall or spend hours playing games on the computer. By the time you reach mid-life you know yourself. While some of those things might sound appealing for a day, anything more than that I'd find depressing.

I need structure even if its self imposed. I need to lie down at the end of a day and see that day was marked. I know I'm not defined by a title, but if someone wants to label me a homemaker I don't mind. Homes need to be made so I'll view that as a compliment. Life might be a big picture but that picture is full of detail, intricate and complex. Someone has to fill in the detail.

So I sort, wipe, file, and organize. I make phone calls, greet repairmen, deal with the mail. I wait with a smile while car brakes are inspected and the dog is examined by the vet. I take care in planning meals and travel and all the bells and whistles that make special occasions special. I run on a literal treadmill. I write blog posts and essays. I remember birthdays, read books, and pen letters that need stamps. I keep track of dental appointments, library due dates and income tax returns. I participate in a women's bible study and play Bunco now and then. I talk on the phone with my mom and my girls. I listen, advice, commiserate, encourage, love. And in this season of life, I pray.

Not the sort of prayers I threw up back in the days of no sleep and parental exhaustion. Nor are my prayers like those of a busy mother juggling the collision of homework, dance lessons and pre-teen drama that occurs everyday between the hours of 4 and 7. We've even navigated the teen years now too, so there are far fewer tears shed and prayers confessed in the dark of night over tempers lost or bad decisions made.

After muddling through this season called mid-life for a year or five, I've come to recognize the blank slate for what it is~a gift. I spend a lot of time alone and God and me have had some really good talks. Oh, back in the days of jam-packed calendars we had some talks too, but it was mostly me doing the talking. And if I'm being honest, my prayers were filled with lots of asking and not a lot of anything else. In hindsight I see that for the season it was. Prayers born more of necessity and immediate need than deep thought. I believe God knows this season and understands.

Enter mid-life. When it comes to talking to God I have all the time in the world. For the first time in my adult life I'm not in a hurry. I observe my children and the path they are walking and can take some time to really think about how to better pray for them. Life is no longer so busy that I can't step back and see the challenges my husband faces in his daily work life or to know his heart when it comes to family and his hopes and dreams for the future. Our parents, siblings, the needy, this nation called America...all the people put in my path in life, they're included regularly now in my conversations with God.

I'm surrounded by so much natural beauty and I finally have the clarity of mind to say thanks. To look back at my life and see how His hand has worked and to stand in awe of that and to acknowledge it too.

I know God hears our every prayer. He understands and answers those that are tossed up by the busy exhausted mom in the carpool line and the quiet contemplative prayers of the mom in mid life trying to figure out her new place in this world.

When your kids are mostly grown up (I realize I have an issue with saying all grown up, but I'm working on it)...anyway when your kids are almost all grown up its sometimes hard to find a way to be relevant. My daughters are independent and that's a good thing...a necessary thing. In fact, it was our goal all those many years ago, back before we understood what the full weight of that word might mean to us as their parents. I know my daughters need to make decisions, and even some mistakes in order to grow, just like I did when I was almost all grown up.

How thankful I am to know now, that in His grand design God didn't make it so we'd just snip a cord and set our children free. He lets us talk to Him when we want to talk to them. He lets us pour out all the worries and hopes a mother's heart can hold and He eases and soothes and gives direction.

Prayer is a way for me to positively impact my children without hindering their need to be independent. It means when I lie my head down on the pillow at night I can say today was not wasted.

Today I prayed.

HP90

Welcome to this week's edition of the Wednesday Hodgepodge, aka HP90. It's a lot like PX90 except this is a workout for your brain.

Sometimes.

Sometimes it's just fluff, but in mid August as summer winds down and the school year gears up fluff may be just what your brain needs. Add your link to the bottom of my post before you run off and see the neighbors.

Here are my answers~

1. Aloha! On August 21, 1959 Hawaii officially became a US State...have you ever been? Upon arrival would you prefer an orchid or a hibiscus to tuck behind your ear?

I've been.

You might say I got my start there.

Based on this picture taken with my older sister in sunny Honolulu I think I've gotta go with hibiscus. My mama thought it suited me once upon a time.

Fun family trivia-my parents were living in Honolulu when Hawaii became a state. She was already a state by the time I made my grand entrance.

2. Since we're talking tropical...what's your favorite food or beverage made with pineapple?

I make something we call pineapple stuffing which is always a hit. It's a simple recipe and the perfect accompaniment to a ham dinner. I'm happy to share the recipe...send me an email if you're interested.

3. Do you believe in soul mates? Explain.

As in there's only one person out there for you and you must search the world over to find him? No. But I do think once you marry your spouse can and should become your soul mate.

4. Share a memory about the house you grew up in.

My younger sister and I were afraid of the basement. It's unfinished and not a walk out so not an overly bright space, even with all the lights on. When I was a kid the laundry was down there along with a ping pong table, our dress ups, Christmas decorations, my dad's workbench and the extra frig and freezer. The stairs came down into the center and dead ahead was a black hole.

Actually dead ahead was a perfectly benign crawl space, but whoa! could our imaginations ever run wild.

My sister will not disagree when I tell you some of the most dreaded words my mother ever uttererd in our childhood were 'Can one of you girls go down in the basement and get me xyz?" We shared an unspoken pact to never go alone. It was sisterly bonding at its surest and finest.

True confessions...it's possible I still don't like my mom to send me down to the basement to fetch something.

5. Are you comfortable with silence?

Yes, as long as it's not angry silence.

I feel the need to fill angry silence with talking. This sometimes makes angry people even more angry but I can't help it. I was born with the talking gene.

6. You spot a giant spider on your bedroom wall...what's your next move? (all spiders are giant, right?)

If hubs is home I call him to deal with it. If he's not home my next move depends on the sound I anticipate the spider will make when squashed. If it's going to crunch I can't handle it. I'll throw a heavy book on top of it and leave it there til hubs returns. If it looks like the spider lacks the crunch factor I'll grab no less than 800 paper towels and scoop it up with my eyes closed.

Here's another fun family fact-one time hubs and I were out and came home after our girls were in bed. They were in high school at the time. As we climbed the stairs I noticed a Tupperware bowl turned upside down in the middle of the staircase. There was a post-it note placed strategically nearby that said 'SPIDER' and then had an arrow pointing to the bowl.

I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

7. My idea of fun does NOT include_____________.

braggarts, complainers, taxes, or the dentist

8. Insert your own random thought here.

We saw this in a yard near the kayak launch on Saturday -

The family who lives in this house has five Goldens! FIVE! So cute!

I love dogs as much as the next person but can you imagine all that hair?

I could see the wheels turning in my hubs head because he'd love a houseful of setters, but I put the kibosh on that thought before he could even formulate it into a sentence said aloud.

Questions for the Hodgepodge-Vol 90

Volume 90! We've been at this a while it seems. Thanks for playing along every week. Or every other week. Or once in a blue moon.

Here are this week's questions....be sure to come back tomorrow and add your link to the party.

1. Aloha! On August 21, 1959 Hawaii officially became a US state. Have you ever been? Upon arrival would you prefer an orchid or a hibiscus to tuck behind your ear?

2. Since we're talking tropical...what's your favorite food or beverage made with pineapple?

3. Do you believe in soul mates? Explain.

4. Share a memory about the house you grew up in.

5. Are you comfortable with silence?

6. You spot a giant spider on your bedroom wall...what's your next move? (all spiders are giant, right?)

7. My idea of fun does NOT include ______________.

8. Insert your own random thought here.

Now and Then

When our girls were little we spent several summers sharing a beach house with another family. They have two daughters the same age as ours so it worked out well. Those were the days of mini vans, and loading them up for a week at the beach was a bit like working a jigsaw puzzle. The dads turned it into an art form and beach chairs and shovels, umbrellas and sand pails, coolers and suitcases, were squeezed into every nook and cranny before we could begin the two hour trek from Annapolis to Bethany Beach Delaware.

The excitement in the car was almost palpable and to this day my girls will say those weeks spent at Bethany are some of their fondest childhood memories.

Bethany is known as 'the quiet resort' I guess because it lacks the nightclubs and carnival rides you'll find in the neighboring towns of Ocean City and Rehobeth. There are still plenty of people, a small boardwalk, and a little town center where you can buy ice cream, skim boards, t-shirts, and 'chotchkies'. Oh, how little girls love them some chotchkies.

Fast forward twelve years and those same friends now own a home in a neighborhood near that very same beach. We spent the weekend revisiting old favorites and exploring new. The town itself hadn't changed a whole lot and we were glad. It's still small, still mostly families relaxing on the beach and kids playing in the surf. The smell of sunscreen and boardwalk fries, salt water taffy and sea air all greet us on the familiar breeze of some long ago summer.

We're minus the mini vans and the 8 and 10- year old pony tailed darlings, but I still love the feel of my toes in the sand.

Hubs and his pal kayaked and golfed, and we all enjoyed a leisurely lunch beside the bay. Lobster Bloody Mary anyone?

Rest assured, it tasted every bit as good as it looks.

The view wasn't too shabby either.

We picked crabs on the screened in porch Friday night and had a grown up dinner in a nice restaurant on Saturday. When we had little girls in tow, we didn't do a lot of grown up dinners in nice restaurants. We did pizza on the beach and that was fun too.

For everything there is a season.

Ice cream of course, is always in season. Hubs was, and is, slightly obsessed with Dickey's soft serve. It's the thickest, richest, most delicious frozen custard I've ever eaten, so thick in fact you almost need a fork.

Just so you know, a weekend requires at least two.

It was fun to be back in Bethany.

Fun to remember beach days spent with little girls.

Fun to know they've grown into the lovely young women we could only imagine back then.

Fun to be back where a kite and a memory are caught up in the same gush of salty sea air.

Where time is marked by the ebb and flow of the ocean tide...

...and the golden days of summers old and new we spent beside her.