Friday, December 2, 2016

You're Never Too Old For A Time-Out

So hubs decided he needed to organize and clean out the upstairs garage.

At 6 PM.

On a Tuesday night.

For some reason this really irritated me, and it's okay for me to say it because he knows. Let's just say when I'm overly tired and overly 'whelmed' I don't hide it very well. Our furniture and belongings were delivered just over three weeks ago and in that time we've also had overnight house guests, hosted Thanksgiving dinner, and put up two Christmas trees. Still, everything is not yet in it's rightful place and that makes him twitch a little. Prior to moving in he knew unpacking and figuring it all out would be a process, and he said sure, fine, he's okay with it, but...

We've been married for 32 years, 5 months, and sixteen days so I knew he would not really be okay with it. Hubs subscribes to the philosophy of a place for everything and everything in it's place, and if that means tackling a garage at 6 PM on a Tuesday night so be it.

I on the other hand, am more Scarlett O'Hara and will think about that tomorrow.

Thirty two years people. It works.

I wish I were more like him in this respect, but since I'm not I went ahead and gave myself a time out.

When my girls were young I didn't really use the phrase time out, but I did employ the concept. One daughter may have spent a large chunk of the third year of her life 'sittin' on the step' because my heavens she had a will of iron and needed the last word.

Her mother's daughter in every sense of the word.

It's why I know there are times I need to send myself to the proverbial step, and in this house I've decided that 'step' will be here-

My master bathroom.

Specifically my time outs involve filling that tub all the way up with steaming hot water, turning down the lights, and letting Calgon take me away.

Well not Calgon because do they even make that anymore? Truly I could sleep in this tub it is that comfortable.

Hubs doesn't quite get the concept of time out and interrupted me twice, but he needed that garage organized. Here's how it went... I'm soaking, regaining my equilibrium, and he comes in to the bathroom carrying an enormous bin of miscellaneous linens that I've purposely left in the garage because that's where we're leaving things we're not sure what to do with. I need to go through this bin and see what fits on the current bed situation, and decide what to keep and what to give away. Hubs says that sounds like it should take two seconds, which I suppose in theory it should, but I just with one more thing on Tuesday night.

So I asked him to put it back in the garage and he did, because 32 years, 5 months, and 16 days doesn't happen without both of you knowing when you gotta go left or turn right.

And because that's true, when my 'time out' ended I looked through the bin and made the call about what to keep and what to give away in about two seconds, and everyone was happy.

I'm telling you a hot bath is good for whatever ails you.


  1. You two sound a lot like us! Moving is so stressful.
    Your bathroom looks lovely! Also, a bath for time out? Yes!

  2. I thoroughly enjoyed this post, and I sooo get it! lol. My hubs and I are the exact opposite of you and yours as I MUST get things in their proper place, and he can only do so much for so long. But after 42 years we each know pretty well how the other works and when it is time to 'roll with it" or back away, lol. Love your tub btw!

  3. Beautiful tub! I would give myself lots of time outs!!!

  4. Sounds very familiar!
    It's looking very pretty around your place! 😀

  5. Oh Lordy, how I can relate! Here's to knowing when to walk away, when to sigh, and when to just smile and think "it's a good thing I love you because if I didn't you'd be toast, buster!" It's what makes it work.

  6. Well, almost 32 years for us and just flip it around...Joe is more like you and I'm more like your hubs...but getting older has tempered it some. I'm pretty much okay with "tomorrow" now. LOL Love your master bath. Beautiful. I must say that I haven't had a bath in years...I'm a shower girl and soaking doesn't appeal to me at all. Perhaps I should give it a try!! :)

  7. The whole idea of packing & moving things to a new spot? I think I need to come over & take a bath in that tub too ;)

  8. I am sitting here laughing my head off! What a cute, cute story and in our house, it would be me as your Hubs and Tommy as you. Have mercy, I want it done and I wanted it done yesterday. Yes, 45 years and 5 months have served us well and we just roll with it. Your bath is gorgeous and so glad it can serve as a retreat for you when you've had "enough." I can easily get my fill of things and need a "time out" as well. 'Tis the season!!!!

  9. Your bathroom looks lovely and I'd be hiding in the bath too but my hubby would have given up on unpacking long before me lol

  10. Loved your story. Thanks for sharing.

  11. We were at a marriage conference a couple weekends ago (a tune-up as we approach year 30 at the end of this month). One speaker said, "Opposites attract...for the first 7 years."

    I'm definitely more likely to burn out when organizing stuff than he is. I love to organize, but have mental limits. And when I's hads enough, I's hads enough. I've been known to take a bath as a time-out. But I lock the bathroom door!!

  12. I think that's true if you're opposites in values, spiritual beliefs, life direction. But I think if you understand you approach life a little differently in the day to day things then opposites come together in a good way. We are alike in the core matters, and he encourages me/ I calm him in the daily challenges. That works : )

  13. Consider yourself lucky. I was married to someone who never cleaned out anything no matter what time it was. OTOH, my father was a cleaner and if you wanted to keep something you had better be there or it would end up in the trash. Thanks for sharing your story.

  14. I think that is the perfect place for a time out! I wish someone here knew how to turn left or right after 30 years, 11 months of marriage but, nope. I'm like your hubs but mine is as close to a messy hoarder as one can get without being termed, a hoarder. Life is somewhat stressful around here. If I put him in a box, can I give him away? LOL Maybe I just need one of those big tubs. :)

  15. GREAT blog post. Thanks for the honesty and also for permission to take a time out when needed. All so true.

    BTW, I like your cabinetry: white so it's not dark, but with that antique stain so soil/dust/etc won't show so much. My black cabinets (not entirely my choice, by the way, but I won't go THERE) are waaaaay too dark for my psyche. But I'm being a big girl and just living with them. I don't feel like throwing $$ at changing them any time soon.

    Sometime our hubs are a little slow to figure out the time out thing.

  16. Love your tub, it is gorgeous. You need a beautiful holder across the tub or a small table for a glass of wine!

  17. I could not agree more, Joyce. I have a corner Jacuzzi tube so when its time for my 'time out' I also fill it up with hot steamy water, some Epson salts, baking soda and lots of essential oils, turn the lights down, light a candle or two, turn on the jets and go somewhere else in my mind. Works every time. Love your new bath!

  18. Love that tub! It looks like it would be easy to 'recline' in. We've had to 'negotiate' our way in the whole 'when the time is right' thing. He like to chat about the day at 11:00pm. Yeah, not my favorite chatting hour. ;)

  19. I took your advice and took a bath the other night. It was wonderful. I haven't had a bathtub for a long time and now that I have one I forget to use it, plus I'm not really good at sitting and doing nothing. But, I ran it extra hot, put some bubble bath in, turned on my music, and it was really nice.