Tuesday, October 30, 2018


More of the Write 31 Days Challenge....

Today's one word prompt-moment

Actually this was Fridays prompt but since I didn't get there I'm using it today.
I'm allowed.

So where were we?
My thirties. The second half. (You'll find Part 1 here).

We left North Jersey at the end of Daughter1's kindergarten year. Hubs was so ready to let go of the crazy insane commute he was making and the crazy insane interest rate we were paying on our mortgage (remember not everything about the early 90's was fabulous) and he was especially excited for a new work challenge. Plus Annapolis. Who wouldn't want to live there?

I had mixed feelings. That's how I roll when you say 'we're moving'. I do love a clean slate, fresh start but I also love warm and familiar. I was settled with my babies and my friends and my house without air conditioning. Moving means change and I always have to resist before I march headlong.

But I marched headlong because that's what you do, and I fell in love with the town beside the Bay.

With our new house and our little cul-de-sac with kids spilling out everywhere and hubs ten minute commute. With the sweet school nearby and our church down the road. Piano lessons every Tuesday and ballet class in Maryland Hall. Girl scouts, family camping, Disney World. The swingset out back and homework at the kitchen table. Blue crabs picked by tiny hands on a warm summer day.

New people, new places, new experiences.

No social media.
Real life in real time.

I went back to work part time in my thirties. My girls were in all day school then and the preschool Daughter2 had attended was looking for a teacher two days a week. The Director knew I had a background in education so she approached me about a job. I remember thinking, 'Work? Wait...what?? How in the world can I work? Am I capable of managing a room full of four year olds?'

I think this is sometimes a side effect of being a stay-at-home mom. You forget a few things about yourself. Never mind that once upon a time I had a caseload approaching 90...when it came to working outside the home I was rusty.

But I was also ready.

This little school and the people in it were so dear and the work hours meshed so well with my own girls school I said yes. My second year there I taught three days a week and the year after that half day kindergarten. The staff was wonderful and I enjoyed interacting with the parents too. Five is my absolute favorite age, the perfect mixture of curiosity, sweetness, and mischief, and getting back in the classroom reminded me I was good at this sort of work.

I think if I could pick any age to be forever it would be 35. That's the age where I really and truly got completely comfortable in my own skin. Where I fully acknowledged my strengths and abilities and put them to use. In motherhood. In the world of work. In the volunteer community that makes the world go round. If I had to choose one word to describe these years my word would be 'satisfying'.

So what are some take aways from this decade?

Change adds things to your life you didn't know were missing.

Treasure your parents.

Perfection is overrated so stop chasing it.

Say yes to things that feed your soul.

Save for retirement.

The value of a good night's sleep cannot be overstated.

Get the babysitter. Tag along on that work trip with your husband. Leave the grandparents in charge and get away with the one you married. One day in the not so distant future you'll be 'just us' again.

Make room in your day and life for seeing the small things.

You don't have to have it all figured out.

Pray. Seek wisdom. You are loved by the God who sees and you're not doing this thing--parenting, relationships, work, life, everything--alone.


  1. Loved this post and learning more about you. I also like your takeaways from that time, especially the last one. So very true.

  2. It's funny, I did love my thirties and I thought it was great. But as I approach my 60th birthday (Eeeek!) I realize how much I have learned since then. The ever changing, ever evolving, ever learning, living breathing thing. I think perhaps I love life even more now than I did then!

  3. As I read all your blogs and especially the ones of your thirties, I see not a perfect life, but a wonderful and satisfying life. A life I only ever dreamed about (and that is not a complaint, things just happened to change for me in my thirties!) Anyway, you are right about all the things you discovered in your thirties and that is a great list you compiled. I found 35 to be the age also where I became comfortable with myself also. You have been blessed to live in some beautiful parts of the world.

  4. Great take aways from the 30's! Amen. I think I 'preferred' my 40's. Or should I say the kids middle school years. :)

  5. My 30s were great too. That's when I met Joe and we married. Yes. Good stuff here!

  6. Good suggestions/encouragements for the 30's and other decades of life. :)

  7. My 'forever age' is 35, too, Joyce. At my peak and comfortable with myself.

  8. Thank you...advice I needed to hear...and to apply...

  9. My 30th birthday was the most difficult for me for some reason. The 30's for me were full of growing up a very active son and a very outgoing daughter, while trying to be the super wife of a minister. It wasn't my greatest hour, but we all survived those years and took much of the turmoil and joys into my 40's.