Five Minutes Of Determine

Trying my hand at Five Minute Friday today, a weekly link up hosted by Kate Motaung. She posts a one word prompt and we write for five minutes flat, no editing or overthinking, ahem. 

Today's prompt-determine

I was thinking about my dad this week, specifically about the year he died. Hubs and I were living about two hours north of my parents back then and our girls were toddlers. I was in a Bible Study that year, with a group of women from my church, and I had so many questions about the particular book we were using as one of our resources. 

My dad wasn't a big talker but I would call home every week and ask his take on the theology presented in whatever chapter had been discussed that Tuesday morning. Was it right or off base? Does it line up with what I've always believed and if not help me understand. Explain it to me. Tell me what you think it means. 

A small sweet memory that stays mostly tucked into the corner of my head and heart. 

My dad died young, only a few years older than I am right now. When I saw today's word I thought of the verse in Job (14:5) that says, -"A person's days are determined; you have decreed the number of his months and have set limits he cannot exceed." 

Or as the Living Translation puts it-""You have decided the length of our lives. You know how many months we will live, and we are not given a minute longer." 

God determines my days. He decides. A lot or a little. The amount doesn't always make sense to my human mind, but I know He doesn't make mistakes. That His ways are higher than mine. That while He's given me some number of days, I determine how they're filled. 

Nearly 30 years have come and gone since we last hung up the phone. The world has grown and groaned and turned into something he probably wouldn't recognize in 2022. I've grown too, partly due to the wisdom that comes with aging, but also in large part due to study. Years and years of reading and asking questions and holding everything up next to God's word to see if it fits. 

How I'd love an icy cold Birch Beer and a chat with my dad today, about the deep and mysterious workings of God. 

Just Write

I've joined a writing accountability group to kick off this new year, which is basically eight sessions of concentrated writing time with a group of other writers, all working on various projects, all needing the discipline of a schedule. We meet via Zoom and after a short ten minute intro we all dive in to our projects. 

First I need to figure out what my project is, then I'll dive in. 

In the meantime I blog. Is my blog a project? It could be if I were more disciplined, hence the need for a group. I used to blog more often and the words just flew out of my brain and onto the screen. These days too many words constantly swim in my head and most days I can't figure out how to coalesce them into something anyone would want to read. 

When I started blogging I was living overseas and had kids in college. The years rolled by and there were moves and retirement and daughters getting married and grand babies coming and all of these seasons of living and the events they brought with them were easy to write about. I know my niche and try to stay in my lane because that's when I do my best writing.

What is my lane in 2022? 

While I've lost some of my focus during the 'Covid years' I know the extraordinary ordinary of everyday life is still my wheelhouse. I actually think we need more of it in the online world. The real world too. Less arguing over everything under the sun, more noticing life's small beauties on a regular basis. 

So that's where we're headed. Where I'm headed. Where I'm steering the proverbial blog car in the year ahead. Likely more of a Sunday drive as opposed to 500 laps around a racetrack at breakneck speed, but still buckle up. Sunday drives can be full of surprises too. 

Five Minutes of Today

My blog always needs a jumpstart this time of year, which is why I signed up for a ten day writing challenge beginning today. The challenge is hosted by Kate Motaung and you'll find details here.

In a nutshell...Kate emails participants a one word prompt every day for ten days, then we write for five solid minutes on the day's prompt. Or more than five solid minutes if that's what works for you. Personally I enjoy the five minute challenge because I tend to be an overthinker. Off we go-

Today's prompt is-TODAY

Starting with a toughie. What to write isn't obvious, at least not to me, and I usually like a theme to keep me on track. Will I figure out a theme? Stay tuned. I did glance back at some old calendars for inspiration and realized we are currently five years and a couple of days into retirement.

Five years and a couple of days out from the routine of work life.

Five years and a couple of days removed from job commitments and employer expectations.

In this current season 'today' quite often feels like a giant canvas crying out for paint. But how much paint? And what color? And which brush to use?

When you work full time or you're in the throes of raising children from toddler to teen you don't have a lot of blank canvas to fill. More like the back of a used envelope if you're lucky. Your todays are pretty well laid out for you, and if you do nothing but get a child fed, bathed, and tucked safely into bed at night you've managed a small masterpiece.

Retirement on the other hand means every day is Saturday and it's up to you to throw as much or as little paint on life's canvas as you wish. Dare. Dream.

In the year 2020 my todays nearly always start here.
I watch with awe as the world's best artist turns the charcoal night sky into watercolor day.

It's where I read and think and plan and pray.

Where I prep the canvas of a brand new today.

A Bunch of Stuff

More like nothing at all but a bunch of stuff sounds a little bit interesting and nothing at all sounds quite the opposite.

Truth be told there are gobs of things I need and want to write about, just not quite yet.

I hate it when bloggers say they have something to tell and then don't tell, but I have a number of things to tell and I'm not telling. Not today anyway, but soon.

I won't say as soon as life settles down because y'all, life just does not seem to ever settle down round here.

Delight! That's my word for this year and I'm hanging on to it by my fingernails. I'm so grateful for my bracelet (read about it here) because I need the visual reminder these days to delight in all the things. I'm not successful every minute of every day, but catching a glimpse of that bracelet on my arm helps a lot.

So does sunshine, which I'm not gonna lie has been in short supply this winter. Yesterday though? Yesterday was glorious and we took advantage of the blue sky-warm air combo and enjoyed a boat ride courtesy of our neighbors. Look no socks!

Temps were in the 60's, we had blankets for our laps, and the sun felt wonderful.

Our boat is at the boat repair place (probably not the official name but whatever) because somehow we wrapped up last year's boating season with a nice little scratch on one side and wanted that fixed before this season launches. We think the scratch happened while docked at a local restaurant but we're not sure. We are sure it wasn't my fault and really that's what matters.

Hubs and I have been volunteering with a local elementary school's water safety program which means every Wednesday afternoon we get in the pool with third grade students and teach basic swimming strokes and general water safety.  There are lots of adult volunteers so we each only have a couple of kids. There's also a lifeguard on duty and I asked last week if she'd ever had to whistle at an instructor. Not yet she hasn't. Ha!

In wedding related news I picked up the bridal gown and my gown and the bride's rehearsal dinner dress from the alterations place last week which was exciting. There are still a lot of little details to be managed but in terms of our wardrobe we're ready. Also, here's a little wedding planning tip-

Use a colored envelope for your replies. So much fun opening the mailbox and seeing all that dusty blue.

Earlier this week I signed up for the April A-Z blog challenge. Kind of on a whim which, let's be honest, is how I always end up signing up for the A-Z.  Somehow this works for me. I do have an idea for a theme this go-round, I just need to find make time to write.

I think to be a good blogger you need to blog several days a week and set your posts to publish first thing in the morning. But here I am ten years in, still blogging when the mood strikes and the planets align, hitting publish on a Wednesday when I should be making dinner.

You know what they say..."If it ain't broke, don't fix it".

Note To Self

A recent prompt in the 31 Day writing challenge was this-

In a letter to your children (or your younger self) write something you wish someone had told you ten years, five years, or even one year ago.  

I've been mulling this over for a few days and here's where I've landed. The things I might wish someone had told me ten years ago? Well, someone probably did tell me. Or tried to tell me, which is the thing about life lessons...you have to live and learn your own. 

Now that's not to say I don't freely dole out advice to my daughters (HA!), but I know from my own experiences and challenges so much of what is given in the way of helpful advice is only recognized as such after we've walked through some stuff. After we've lost our cool or our hope or faced a challenge of one kind or another. Then we take a minute to sit back and re-evaluate and that's usually when advice or wisdom shared once upon a time, rings in my ears and I can say, 'Now I get it'. 

Not always, but in general I need something to apply your words of wisdom to in order for them to stick and have meaning. 

So there's my caveat, but I'll still share something here today because that's my challenge.

Dear Daughters, 

In as much as is possible be the boss of time. Your time. Be deliberate in how you spend it and also how you view it. Sometimes we think a nap on the couch means we're lazy. Sometimes it's the best thing we can do for our family. Sometimes coffee with a friend feels frivolous when what it really is is relationship building, filling in the cracks that come from too little sleep and too many toddler messes. Reassurance you're not crazy or a bad mother or any of the other little things we wonder about ourselves when we spend too much time not having coffee with a friend. 

Figure out what's important and long lasting and give yourself to that. Prioritize what's eternal over what's temporal. Figuring that out can be hard, especially when the world says one thing and your heart says another. Listen to your heart. The world tells us we should be doing all the things all the time, but often there is more good done in the quiet stillness of an early morning. In prayers whispered and dreams shared. Remind yourself of this when life feels overwhelming.  

Establish the habits of daily prayer and reading God's word. So simple to do but so easy to be distracted from. It's tempting to put a million other things before this one thing, but if you put this one thing first then all the other things fall into place. Not always the way we think they should, but always in a way that reminds us God has a plan for our lives, that He's teaching us in every single circumstance we walk through, that He is for us. 

God is for you. 

I was talking with some friends recently and we all said one of our biggest regrets in life is the amount of time we've wasted on unimportant 'stuff' in our adult lives. We're all now in a season where that's easy to see so you'll have to trust me on this. Time wasted is my biggest regret, and I'm sure all the 'time is precious' platitudes were thrown my way when I was your age too. I didn't always take them to heart like I could have should have, but regret is no place to live so never take up residence there. 

Finally my sweet girls, learn to love the sunrise. No matter how off kilter, out of sync, or discouraged you felt when you went to bed yesterday, the sunrise is a reminder there are brand new mercies every single day.  

Because God is for you. 

Write that on an index card and stick it on your bathroom mirror. 

Your 50-something self will thank me. 

Love, 

Momma

Thirtysomething

More of the Write 31 Days Challenge....

Today's one word prompt-moment

Actually this was Fridays prompt but since I didn't get there I'm using it today.
I'm allowed.

So where were we?
My thirties. The second half. (You'll find Part 1 here).

We left North Jersey at the end of Daughter1's kindergarten year. Hubs was so ready to let go of the crazy insane commute he was making and the crazy insane interest rate we were paying on our mortgage (remember not everything about the early 90's was fabulous) and he was especially excited for a new work challenge. Plus Annapolis. Who wouldn't want to live there?

I had mixed feelings. That's how I roll when you say 'we're moving'. I do love a clean slate, fresh start but I also love warm and familiar. I was settled with my babies and my friends and my house without air conditioning. Moving means change and I always have to resist before I march headlong.

But I marched headlong because that's what you do, and I fell in love with the town beside the Bay.

With our new house and our little cul-de-sac with kids spilling out everywhere and hubs ten minute commute. With the sweet school nearby and our church down the road. Piano lessons every Tuesday and ballet class in Maryland Hall. Girl scouts, family camping, Disney World. The swingset out back and homework at the kitchen table. Blue crabs picked by tiny hands on a warm summer day.

New people, new places, new experiences.

No social media.
Real life in real time.

I went back to work part time in my thirties. My girls were in all day school then and the preschool Daughter2 had attended was looking for a teacher two days a week. The Director knew I had a background in education so she approached me about a job. I remember thinking, 'Work? Wait...what?? How in the world can I work? Am I capable of managing a room full of four year olds?'

I think this is sometimes a side effect of being a stay-at-home mom. You forget a few things about yourself. Never mind that once upon a time I had a caseload approaching 90...when it came to working outside the home I was rusty.

But I was also ready.

This little school and the people in it were so dear and the work hours meshed so well with my own girls school I said yes. My second year there I taught three days a week and the year after that half day kindergarten. The staff was wonderful and I enjoyed interacting with the parents too. Five is my absolute favorite age, the perfect mixture of curiosity, sweetness, and mischief, and getting back in the classroom reminded me I was good at this sort of work.

I think if I could pick any age to be forever it would be 35. That's the age where I really and truly got completely comfortable in my own skin. Where I fully acknowledged my strengths and abilities and put them to use. In motherhood. In the world of work. In the volunteer community that makes the world go round. If I had to choose one word to describe these years my word would be 'satisfying'.

So what are some take aways from this decade?

Change adds things to your life you didn't know were missing.

Treasure your parents.

Perfection is overrated so stop chasing it.

Say yes to things that feed your soul.

Save for retirement.

The value of a good night's sleep cannot be overstated.

Get the babysitter. Tag along on that work trip with your husband. Leave the grandparents in charge and get away with the one you married. One day in the not so distant future you'll be 'just us' again.

Make room in your day and life for seeing the small things.

You don't have to have it all figured out.

Pray. Seek wisdom. You are loved by the God who sees and you're not doing this thing--parenting, relationships, work, life, everything--alone.

Audience

You wouldn't know it to read here but I am still sortakinda participating in the October writing challenge called 31 Days To Telling Your Story. For the record, mine is less 31 Days and more something of an abridged version. Still calling it a win though, because even at less than 31 I've already blogged more this month than last.

Has anyone noticed how I spend the whole first paragraph of every single post explaining why I'm not on top of things here?

I printed out the list of prompts at the beginning of the month and have been picking and choosing as the mood strikes. Since I missed the last ten prompts (!?!) I have quite a few to choose from today-

pray-pause-search-who-audience-start-help-common

Today's one word prompt-audience

When you blog you're supposed to have a niche, if you want to be successful at it anyway. I've blogged in this space quite happily for over nine years now, but I've never really had a niche. Unless  you count blabbing on about everything under the sun in which case I'm a success-ha!

My blog is often all over the map in terms of content, but one thing that has remained constant is my target audience. Who are the people in my head when I put words to paper?

My girls.

c. 2009

My girls who were university students when I hit publish on that very first post and who are now adult women with lives of their own.

When I started blogging it surprised me to learn there were people I didn't know reading what I wrote. That something I said resonated and made them think differently or anew about their own story. One of the most frequent comments I've heard from readers through the years has been, 'What you said? Well I feel the same way."

While our stories are uniquely our own there are threads woven throughout that connect us to one another. I love that, and am so grateful for the many ways our lives intersect with each other. I think about those readers when I write, but my litmus test for hitting publish or save and think it over has always been my girls.

All my blog words are filtered through them. Not literally of course, but as I write I'm always hyper aware of the way my words will leap off the page and into their brains, their hearts, their memories. What do I want them to know about me? About my childhood? About how I see the world and my place in it? About the challenges of growing older? The world around me? About my faith, my fears, my failures?

I love being a mother and I don't care if I'm defined as such. It's been my greatest joy and privilege to adore and nurture these amazing women from the very first moments of their lives. Over time I've come to see blogging as a gift. A way to share parts of myself with my daughters as they reach the milestones I've left behind.

I also know that by telling my story here, by putting all the many moving parts of my life into words on a page I've opened a window for them into who I am apart from the word mom.

My audience has learned a lot about me in this space-

I've learned a lot about me too.
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Say When

Hanging on by my fingernails, but still trying to squeeze in 20ish posts before the end of October as part of the 31 Days To Telling Your Story Writing Challenge. It's going to be tight, but I like to think I work well under pressure. Today I'm going with yesterday's prompt because I like to keep you guessing. Also, I missed yesterday.

Our one word prompt-when

As in when it's time for a day in the life kind of catch up on the blog. That needs to happen here periodically or my head will explode from all the things.

So what's been happening here lately?

boat riding
wedding planning
porch sitting
football fanning

crock pot cooking
Neflix streaming
concert going
whole house cleaning

quiet praying
sunset gazing

dinner out
dinner in
talk in real time
soak up face time

neighborhood gathering
pickle ball playing
wine tasting
fund raising

reading
writing
and no 'rithmetic

We've been at home 23 days in a row which honestly feels like some kind of small miracle. We popped into the nearby small big city once or twice and took a leisurely drive over to Asheville one afternoon to meet up with friends passing through, but those were all in keeping with the slower pace that is our Autumn.

When.

As in say when you've had enough trekking and packing and busy-ing and admit you need a month to stay put, slow down, think deep and notice small.

Say when.

What's Your Story?

Well. It has been a long time since I've been here. Long time in the blog world, but I guess only two weeks in real time. For those of you who don't know, the blog world is like dog years where a single day equals something like a hundred. All that to say it feels like this little corner needs a good dusting, and since I'm feeling a lot out of sync with my words I'm going to jump back in with a 31-day writing party.

Go big or go home, right?

Every October there's something on the Internet called the Write 31 Days Challenge, where writers pick a topic and write one post on that topic every day of the month. (you'll find details here). In conjunction with that Kate Motaung (host of Five Minute Friday) will be posting 31 days of five minute free write prompts to help motivate and inspire us to stay the course. Her theme? 31 Days to Telling Your Story...because we all have one.

I'll just say right off the bat, mine will be more like a 20-day writing party because I know me and I know my calendar. Case in point it's October 2nd so I'm already a day behind. Or right on track if I aim for 20 so 20 it is. Some of my posts will be true five-minute entries, some will be more. I'm giving anyone who wants to try it permission to do the same.

Today's one word prompt-story

What's my story? I'm not so sure these days. This middle age thing is trickier to navigate than I had anticipated. Question-am I still middle aged?

I'm going to say yes. The first half of our lives are pretty well defined, or at least mine was. College-work-marriage-work-babies-work-volunteer-teenagers-volunteer-launch young adults out into the world-now what?

Yes, now what?

Technically we fall into the 'retired' category except we're young. Ish. Young to be retired anyway. Too young. Life is flying by and I just want to hit the pause button for a minute while we catch our breath and take stock of where we are and where we've been and where in the world we're going.

Have you ever read a book and somewhere in the middle lost sight of how the main character arrived in the place they are now? When you do it helps to go back and re-read earlier chapters in order to make sense of the present.

Stories are composed of five different elements-setting, character, plot, conflict, and theme. A good author weaves these elements together in ways the reader might not have anticipated. He keeps the story moving forward until the very last page. While I too often want to be the sole author of my own story I can read back through earlier chapters and find myself there.  Not as the author, but as the main character in a story not yet finished.

God is writing my story in ways I cannot predict but know I can trust. He has plunked me down in settings too numerous to mention, peopled the plot with characters and conflict and an overarching theme of His amazing grace.

With every turn of the page He is growing the main character into the person He created her to be.

Hodgepodge Au Revoir

Welcome to the Wednesday Hodgepodge. If you've answered this week's questions add your link at the end of my post, then leave a comment for the blogger linking before you. That's the way we've always rolled here on Wednesday mornings.

  

1. What has been the highlight of your summer so far?

Our summer has been positively jam packed so it's hard to choose just one highlight. If I have to pick I'll go with celebrating my grandson turning one. 

He's just the sweetest y'all. 

2. What do you wish you'd done more of this summer? Less of?

More of? Tuesday nights with hubs. If you don't know what I'm talking about read this post. 

Less of? Carbs-ha! 

3. Something you're looking forward to on your September calendar?

Lots of fun things on our September calendar, including my birthday (and you know how I feel about my birthday), but I'll say the wedding of a friend's daughter. Our girls grew up together in a little Maryland cul-de-sac and I'm excited to celebrate this special day with them. 

4. Best/favorite book you've read this summer?

Again with the 'just one' kind of question? A few I really enjoyed were The Shadow Land by Elizabeth Kostova, None Like Him: 10 Ways God Is Different From Us by Jen Wilkin and The Mistresses of Cliveden: Three Centuries of Scandal, Power and Intrigue in an English Stately Home by Natalie Livingston

5. Share something positive, encouraging, or uplifting here.



6. Insert your own random thought here.

I've decided to retire the weekly Wednesday Hodgepodge. I've gone back and forth about it, but in the end feel the time has come. When I first started blogging weekly hops were a regular part of everyone's content, but now not so much. 

I will likely still do some Hodgepodge style posts from time to time, because let's be honest my whole blog is a bit of a hodgepodge, and I may add a link option to those type posts when I do. I'm kind of still figuring it all out, but I do know I'm ready to let go of the pressure to create, post, and manage weekly questions.  

I  have so enjoyed hosting this weekly link up and hope you'll continue to visit here and see what's new. Thank you for sharing your Wednesday mornings with me here on From This Side Of The Pond.

For anyone who may be interested Kate Motaung has posted 31-days of free write prompts for the month of October over on the Five Minute Friday blog. I'm planning to participate and hope to see some of you there.  

The Winds Of Change Are Blowing Through The Hodgepodge

Hello Hodgepodgers and any others who might be reading here today. If you're a regular in the HP please be sure to read my random thought today. I'm sure nobody skips to the bottom and just adds a link ahem, but I've got HP news in my random so you'll want to at least read that.

Now on to this week's questions...if you've answered add your link at the end of my post. Be sure to hop over and leave a comment for the blogger before you too, because that's how we roll. Here we go-

1. I feel most energized when I _______________________.

Tick things off a to-do list. Accomplish a difficult or particularly annoying task I've put off.  Am fed and well rested-ha! Just keepin' it real. If I'm tired and hungry I get cranky. 

2. Where were you ten years ago?

In mid-July of 2008 I was enjoying a blue sky day in London with the hubs and our girls-

And walking our pup on the paths that ran through the fairy tale ferns in our little English village-

Note what I'm wearing on July 20, 2008!

3. July 17th is World Emoji Day. Do you use emojis? Which one's your favorite? Your most used?

I use emojis in texts, mostly just texts to my family though. My favorite is probably the smiley face blowing a kiss, but my most used is the smiley face with the heart eyes. Daughter1 says I love to add lots of heart eyes to any posted pics of baby boy. I can't help it. He gives me all the heart eyes. 

4. What song would you put on a wedding DO NOT PLAY list?

Quite a few actually, but The Macarena was the first to come to mind. 

5. What deserves less of your attention? More of your attention?

The less part of this question is hard for me right now. I have been doing all the things that need doing this summer and haven't had a lot of time to 'waste' on things that don't need my attention.

As far as more of my attention I'm going to say writing. I miss it and am trying to figure out a way to make it happen on a more regular basis. 

Which brings me to my random thought...

6. Insert your own random thought here.

Although it's not that random because I've been mulling this 'random' over for quite a while now. 

I'm going to take a break from the Wednesday Hodgepodge. I've struggled with the commitment all summer and am still looking at a very busy end of July-August calendar. But mostly it's this-

I miss writing and I want to make room for that in my life again. 

I know the Hodgepodge is writing, but it's not the only writing I want to do. And because we've had so much going on here this spring and summer it seems what little time I do have to write I've had to spend on the Wednesday Hodgepodge. 

That's not to say I don't love it, and especially the people I've come to know here, but I do need to make some adjustments and this feels like the right time to do it. 

So here's the deal...this will be the last Wednesday Hodgepodge for the summer. I will definitely host one more the first week in September for anyone who wants to participate, and then will see how I feel about continuing in the current format or maybe in an updated format. Or maybe putting a bow on it and calling it done. Stay tuned. 

In the meantime I do have plans to blog, to read blogs which is something else I've missed, and to write outside my blog.  I hope you'll add me to your reader,  follow me by email or on Instagram where I normally link. Or send me a FB friend request as I also link my blog there. You can follow along using any of these methods by clicking the links just under the Welcome section on my sidebar. 

I have truly loved this little weekly gathering. I've learned a lot and laughed a lot and I look forward to seeing what's next. Mark your calendars for Sept 4/5 if you want to be sure and catch the return of the Hodgepodge. 

Cheers! Joyce 




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Heigh Ho Heigh Ho It's The Hodgepodge

Welcome to another edition of the Wednesday Hodgepodge. If you've answered this week's questions add your link at the end of my post, then leave a comment for the person linking before you. And anyone else you have a chance to visit today because comments make the blog world go round.

Here we go-

1. What would you say is your biggest day to day challenge?

Hmmm...what's for dinner? I mean seriously, every single day. Or maybe loading pictures onto my blog? In the past year this computer, or maybe it's blogger or perhaps the it's the operator has become persnickety. If I upload photos to my computer I have to shut the whole thing down and restart in order for them to be made available for upload to my blog, even though I can see them in my photos. So annoying! Of course I'm not doing that every day, so maybe that doesn't count as an answer to this question. 

I guess I'm going to say carving out chunks of time for writing or establishing a routine when it comes to writing. I'm all over the map and mostly it feels like snippets are all I can manage these days. I find it really frustrating. 

2. May 16th is National Biographers Day. What's a biography you really enjoyed reading? Is this a genre you read regularly?

One of my all-time favorite books is The Hiding Place. It's classified as a biography even though Corrie ten Boom is listed as one of the authors along with John and Elizabeth Sherril. And yes I do enjoy reading biographies, but wouldn't say that's my go-to genre. 

3. How important is keeping a clean house? Do you need to de-clutter your life?

I like a clean house but am not an obsessive cleaner. I want my home to feel comfortable, like you could plop down on the couch and we could relax with a cup of tea or a glass of wine. A too tidy house makes me twitch. 

My hubs likes to vacuum so he stays on top of that. He's also in charge of (and excels at) cleaning the stove top and the granite. We share the housekeeping chores, and since there's usually just the two of us here not a lot of mess. Dust is another story. Where does it all come from???

4. You're the 8th dwarf. What's your name?

Gabby of course. 

5. What's surprised you the most about your life or life in general?

How fast time moves. 

6. Insert your own random thought here.

"It wouldn't be a holiday round here without a hedgehog in there somewhere." What my daughter2 said when she gave me the most adorable Mother's Day gift-

I love it! She gave me the cutest box filled with all kinds of goodies including these glasses, one for her and one for me. 

Hers says 'I got it from my Mama' and mine says 'She got it from me'.  

She's my favorite bride-to-be. 




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Hit Me Hodgepodge One More Time

Welcome to this week's edition of The Wednesday Hodgepodge. If you've answered the questions today add your link at the end of my post. Be sure to leave a comment for your neighbor because that's what makes the Hodgepodge roll. Here we go-

  

1. What keeps you blogging?

My love of writing, my love for the written word, the space and opportunity provided to record events and memories and the everyday ordinary stuff of life. What in the world would I do with all the words in my head if I didn't blog? 

2. Some people like to travel in the winter months. Do you enjoy the beach in winter? According to Southern Living the best U.S. beach towns to visit this winter are-

St Simons Island (Georgia), Hilton Head (South Carolina), Bald Head Island (North Carolina), Seaside (Florida), Bay St. Louis (Mississippi), Cape San Blas (Florida), South Padre Island (Texas), Folly Beach (South Carolina), Chincoteague (Virginia), Duck Key (Florida), Nags Head (North Carolina), and Fairhope (Alabama)

Have you been to any of the towns listed (in any season)? Which on the list appeals to you most this winter?

My love of travel in any season of the year is a well established fact on From This Side Of The Pond. I am trying to avoid air travel in the middle of this year's flu season, but many of these beach destinations are within a day's drive so could happen.  I've been to Hilton Head, Folly Beach, Duck Key, and Nags Head. Hilton Head is the only one I've visited in the winter months, and like I said I think the beach is beautiful year round. I love Duck Key and would probably opt for that one in the winter months. Or Seaside. I've never been but have heard it's lovely.

3. What's a song you're embarrassed to know all the lyrics to? Are you really embarrassed or do just think you should be?

I don't think I'm embarrassed to know any song lyrics, but I suppose it might depend on the setting in which I were asked to share. In the privacy of my own shower/car/kitchen there's no song I'm too embarrassed by to sing. 

How 'bout Britney Spears Hit Me Baby One more time or The Spice Girls Wannabe? What can I say...my girls were children of the 90's, and honestly I'm not really embarrassed to know the lyrics. Actually singing the lyrics in the presence of anyone outside my immediate family would be embarrassing but that's not what the question asked. 

4. When you were a kid what's something you thought would be fantastic as an adult, but now that you're an adult you realize it's not all that fantastic?

Eating what I wanted whenever I wanted. 

5. Share a quote you hope will inspire you in 2018.

"If you wait for inspiration to write you're not a writer. You're a waiter." Dan Poynter

6. Insert your own random thought here.

Paying taxes and going to the dentist. 
How I spent my Tuesday. 
Good times! 

The Written Word

Hodgepodgers see note here. 

I sometimes participate in a Friday link up called Five Minute Friday where we're given a one word prompt, and then we write for five unedited-unspellchecked minutes on that prompt because we love the written word and need to spill some on a weekly basis. A few months back someone in the group collected a bunch of entries that had been posted in the FMF link-up over the course of the past five years, and she put them together in a book, and that book is now available on Amazon (all proceeds benefiting The Vine School and Take Action in South Africa), and I have an essay there with my surname missing a letter, but as I said-unedited. Like this post. ahem. 

Anyway, I got a copy of the book this week and I re-read my entry (which originally appeared on my blog in September 2013) and I missed the girl who wrote it. I've been thinking about how I used to write about things I think and feel and notice and now I seem to just write about what I do, and I don't like that nearly so much. I promised myself I'd try to get reacquainted with that girl and I know there are far too many ands here, but sometimes stream of consciousness is necessary.

I've had a lot going on. Big things and hard things and family things that need tending thousands of miles away and between the house build and the things that have needed tending there's not a lot of time to write. I do have five minutes most days though so I'm going to try more five minute entries, less novel-esque tomes.

Starting tomorrow, because this one is already bordering on wordy.

I saw my daughter1 in The Evergreen State last week. It was a bit spur of the moment, but I accompanied my mom on a trip she needed to make to Arizona, and since we were already on that side of the country we said, "hey why not?". My mom hadn't seen daughter1 since daughter1's wedding in January 2015, so this sidetrip was a real bright spot in an otherwise difficult week. My mom and I then flew back to SC on Saturday which made for a grand total of five flights and some 4,478 miles but who's counting? My mom is such a trooper y'all. For real.

Also, I'm moving in something like 28 days and I tried not to think about that too much while I was on the other side of the country, because there were many, many other things to think about, but yesterday I paused for a minute and realized I'm moving in something like 28 days. I've got furniture in storage in another state, furniture we purchased in NC waiting on a delivery date, furniture we purchased in SC also waiting on a delivery date, furniture in the apartment that needs to be collected by the rental company, utilities to transfer, utilities to organize, official address changes to be made in writing to a thousand and one people and service providers, window treatments to give the go ahead to, and quite likely a few hundred other little bits and pieces I don't even know I don't know.

On Sunday evening we took our builder and his wife for a boat ride, and as we made our way back to our dock the sun dropped into the water with a glorious watercolor flourish. There were very few boats on the lake and as the sky turned from orangey pink to a deep dark indigo I let the quiet wash over me.

We are known and loved by the One who made this. The One who gives us second chances, new mercies, and beautiful sunset skies. The One who says don't worry about tomorrow.

The One who says don't worry.

A Stroll Down Blog Memory Lane

I woke up this morning wondering what in the world I'd blog about at the beginning of a new week given the quiet weekend with the snow and the ice and the staying in my awesome sweater pants for two solid days.

Yes, bloggers sometimes wake up wondering what in the world there is to say that hasn't already been said or that won't bore readers to tears.

As I lay there thinking it dawned on me that it was on a long ago January day I first began blogging. January 21, 2009. A Wednesday like any other except I was living in England and my girls were in college and I didn't understand what a blog was, but other than that the same as Wednesdays in 2016.

Seven years.

A lot has happened in seven years, this I know without looking at life spelled out in writing. Still, I thought today it might be fun to look back to the first month of the year in days gone by. What was on my blog in January as the calendar rolled round and round into the future?

Also, I like photographs and there are many here on From This Side of the Pond, so as a bonus I'm going to choose one favorite from every January since the first one. That won't be hard at all.

2009

England. A trip to Leeds Castle. Cleaning out my nightstand. Procrastinating. My dog. Moving house. Moving country. Goodbyes.

I had no comments on my first post and one comment on my second. It was from my girl's high school Young Life leader who had moved back to the US a couple of years prior. Always the encourager.

My third post had two comments, again one from the YL leader and one from, GASP!, a stranger. And then later more strangers, with real life friends weighing in now and then, but the strangers! 

Where do the strangers come from? How do they find my blog? Are they stalkers? Is this safe? What in the world am I doing? I had no idea strangers would read my blog, and certainly no idea they'd comment. Why would a stranger read my blog?

Writing was suddenly a thrilling kind of scary fun.

2010

fondue, transition, repatriation, what I learned blogging for one whole entire year, random dozens answered, a book giveaway, my sleep habits, my dog's sleep habits, and a look back at boating on the Chesapeake with golden haired girls who went and grew up

2011

snow, ice, more snow and more ice, NYC, NYC in the snow and ice, college-aged daughters home for the holiday, random dozens answered, the routine of mid-life, attempting zumba, a traveling husband, my back yard hawk, the Cake Boss, airport runs, taxes, transitions and goodbyes

2012

a new year, college-aged daughters home, grown up daughters working in big cities, hanging out with said grown up daughter in a big city, our nation's capital, goodbyes and transitions, NYC food, NYC energy, Hodgepodge questions asked and answered, a traveling husband, jet lag, hiking with jet lag, my pup, the Garden State, and a camping recap from an accidental winter camping trip taken with Girl Scouts more than ten years prior

2013 

a new year, Hodgepodge questions asked and answered, hanging out with a grown up daughter in a big city, both of us sicker than dogs, my sweet pup, beauty in the Garden State, the weather, snow days, snow days gone by, Maryland days gone by, the Superbowl

2014

days I'd like to do-over, homemade Christmas crafting, Hodgepodge questions asked and answered, being brave, fragments, regular crafting, five minutes of deep thoughts, everyday mid-life, and snow

2015

The wedding. That's it. The wedding. To put it another way- love, marriage, daughters growing up, DIY, friends, dreams, plans, the weather, and the best day ever.

To summarize-

Count on me discussing weather during the month of January.
Also eating, drinking, and sleeping all of which seem interesting at the time.
I miss my pup, big snows, a country not my own, and daughters asleep in their bedrooms upstairs.
The earth is full of so much beauty it sometimes makes my heart burst.
I've said a lot of goodbyes.
There is enormous satisfaction in capturing small moments and ordinary days.
I feel complete surprise at the fullness of life in a season called middle age.

On Being Present

Linking up with Five Minute Friday today. Easy peasy. Set the timer. Write. No editing, no second guessing. Just do it.

Today's prompt-present

I haven't participated in Five Minute Friday in several weeks mostly because it tends toward the deep and I've been swimming in the shallow end on my blog of late. I was scrolling through my dashboard earlier which led to the re-reading of some older posts, and I couldn't help but miss the writer I was. She's still around here somewhere, we just need to get reacquainted. I think that's where this word comes in.

As it happens I've had a post in my draft file labeled Present for some time now. The post was blank, but I'd scribbled the word down almost a month ago with every intention of someday getting back to it. And every week I'd open my dashboard, see it sitting there, and think not today.

So why then did I ever put pen to paper (or fingertips to keyboard) and spell out the word present? Here's the short version...

You know how it's kind of become a thing to have a word for the year? I've done it myself the past four years, when a particular word seemed to be everywhere I turned and felt like it had my name on it...joy, love, fearless, seek...

This year though? This year I just wasn't feeling it. I'd see people talking about their 'one word' and I'd scratch my head and say hmmm...what's going to be my word? And then nothing.

Blank space.

Empty air.

I think sometimes we force this kind of thing and I determined not to do that. Not to pluck a word out of thin air and wear it like a badge and call it mine.

We have a lot going on here at the moment, and I know if you read here you're saying 'doesn't she always???', but really, we have a lot going on here at the moment. And without over thinking it I've just let some of the online stuff go in order to be here. In the middle of my life.

Then there's the fact that recently I've become quite disillusioned with social media. Or maybe it's people I'm weary of. People spouting off and taking offense at every little thing under the sun, desperate to convince me their opinion is the right opinion. I might be late to that party, but Facebook for sure has lost some of it's appeal, both in tone and content. I started skimming more, commenting less, reading less, stepping away.

It's easier than one might think.

As I took some baby steps back it struck me that I'm often only halfway present in the present. I began mentally inventory-ing some of my habits and decided I want less multi-tasking. Less checking of the phone and more real listening. Less feeling irate and more praying. Giving less attention to the whiners and complainers in this world and filling my heart and mind with the beauty of the earth and the people I love.

Present. Really really present.

I guess that's why I left the post blank. The longer it sat the more the idea of sharing it felt almost contrary to the word itself. Contrary to why I chose it. Or did it choose me? But today I clicked on Kate Montaung's blog and Friday link up and there it was.

My word.

And I decided to write it all down because when I write I'm present in my own life. It's where I examine and resolve and remember how satisfying it is to truly be in the moment.  I want more of that this year.

Mishmash

Just a mishmash of things because that's how life feels at the moment. Very mishmash. Like why won't this first line of text move to the left? 

1. Power was restored here yesterday afternoon so whoohoo!

2.  The hydrangeas everywhere you look are absolutely gorgeous this year. More gorgeous than other years it seems so maybe they love an Arctic winter.

In times of transition it's so easy to get bogged down in the negative. I'm a naturally optimistic soul, but even an optimist can struggle with the in-between seasons of life. Hydrangeas are not small dainty blooms. They're big and bold and in your face, demanding you look up and take notice and most every yard in my mom's neighborhood seems to have at least one bush.

When I see the huge bursts of blue and purple loveliness I remember that God is also big and bold...that if I just look up I'll see He's in complete control of where and how I bloom too.

3.  I've been power walking the streets of my childhood most mornings and am reminded of how much I loved growing up here. Neatly trimmed lawns, the elementary school tucked right in amongst the houses, mothers pushing strollers and walking dogs.

The sound of a mower and the scent of freshly cut grass. Does anything whisk you back to childhood quicker than the scent of freshly mown grass? I pass kids riding their bikes to the pool, and remember so well the freedom of my childhood. How I roamed these streets with one friend or a pack of ten, and how a summer day felt like forever.

I'm so thankful for the safe place I called home, for the love and security I was given as a child, and for the freedom to grow up with wide eyed wonder and innocence.  I know not everyone can say that and I don't take it for granted.

4.  This mug belonged to my dad more than 20 years ago, and whenever we'd visit hubs would eye it with envy. Now he's totally legit.

5. My girl loves her some fro yo.

6. Okay, six things.

I need to write about how I can't write, at least not in the way I normally do on this side of the pond. I have no routine here, I'm wearing the same thing every three days because our clothes are a disorganized jumble, paperwork is tucked into bags and pulled out in an attempt to get it together, and just aaaagh!! I'm a person who has always needed space and right now there isn't any. Not the literal kind or more importantly, not the figurative kind either. That's the one I really crave.

I know it's a season and a short one at that. I also know there are lessons to be learned in the waiting, in transition, in time spent here at my mom's and I feel like I'm failing the class. Writing is sometimes just a dumping ground for the day's nonsense, but often it's the place I put my thoughts for processing and making sense of them. When you fall off the writing wagon it's hard to climb back on.

Diving back in after ignoring my blog for a week at a time feels a little bit like joining a movie already in progress. When I write I tend to want all the parameters set perfectly in place before I pick up the pen (mouse). I'm realizing in this particular season that might not be possible.

So here I am, writing a bunch of blobbityblahblahblah, and you know it feels good. Not as good as when I'm organized and clear headed, but it's a start and it's something and sometimes a less than perfect something is better than a nothing.

Enjoy your weekend everyone!

Reading, Writing, Hodgepodging

Yes Hodgepodge is so a verb. Welcome to your mid-week fun in the form of a Wednesday random. Newcomers are always welcome to join in here, but please don't link unless you've actually answered the questions. Do hop over and say hi at least to the blogger who linked before you, because we're friendly here on this side of the pond. 

1. June 23rd is National Pink Day. What's your favorite something pink?

I love the color pink, particularly the softer shades. I often dressed my girls in pink and there's something about a blond haired toddler in pastel pink that to this day tugs at my heartstrings. 

I think for my answer though (no that wasn't my answer, that was the introduction to my answer) I'm going to say a peony. So sweet and lovely and definitely a favorite of mine. 

2. What did you enjoy most about gym class when you were in school? How about the least?

I wasn't a very athletic child, at least in comparison to some kids my age, so I think I enjoyed discovering there were physical activities I was good at. I loved basketball and gymnastics especially. 

As far as least favorite? How about the whole showering at school in the middle of the day nonsense, or sometimes almost right after getting to school if you were unlucky enough to have gym first period? Do p.e. teachers still stand at the shower door with a clipboard and check off your name after a shower? Second on my list of least favorite would be the rope climb. The gym felt ten stories tall on those days. 

3. What memory is brought to mind by the smell of roses?

I love roses, but I'm not sure their scent brings to mind anything more than simple summertime. My dad grew roses and there was often a rose bud in a vase on our kitchen table. 

4. Do you prefer to read or write? 

Do I prefer my left hand or my right hand? My first or second child? Chocolate cake or a chocolate bar? I enjoy both so much, and in my mind it's impossible to separate the two. I'm fairly certain the best writers are also readers. Reading takes me inside someone else's head and experiences. Writing takes me inside my own. 

5. Sam Keen is quoted as saying, 'Deep summer is when laziness finds respectability.' Would you agree? Is laziness ever respectable? How will you be lazy this summer? 

I agree to a point. I don't think a summer respite necessarily fits the definition of lazy. Lazy means not doing something you should be doing, an unwillingness to work. Rest is a necessary part of life and summer seems the logical time for that to happen. We can't shirk all of our responsibilities but we can enjoy a slower pace, longer daylight, and time with friends and family who are also enjoying a slower pace. I know I accomplish more when I take time to recharge my batteries. Life is rarely an emergency and summer helps me remember that. 

6. The Florida Keys, Disney World, or a resort somewhere on the Gulf Coast...which Florida destination would you choose (and why) if the trip were today?

Definitely a resort on the Gulf Coast. I could use a week there right about now. It's a place I completely relax and decompress and also a place where so many happy family memories have been made. 

I will add though, if my girls and son-in-law could join us, I'd probably change my answer to Disney. 

7. What's a question you hate to answer?

Where's home? 

I guess I don't really mind answering this question, it's just that the answer is long and complicated (at least the way I tell it-ha! ) so sometimes I just say...'We've moved a lot.'  

8. Insert your own random thought here.

So last we spoke it was the Hodgepodge. One whole entire week ago. We've had a busy few days weeks months so finding time and space to blog has been a challenge. 

You should know that in my head I'm blogging. 

And I'm so hoping to get back into some sort of rhythm here shortly. In the meantime, I'm grateful for the Hodgepodge and the friendly faces that keep coming back here. Thanks for riding the wave of transition with me!