It was a dark and stormy night...

I'm linking up over at Mocha with Linda for today's Flashback Friday. The theme is Halloween memories...

Halloween was celebrated in our house when I was growing up but we didn't go overboard. We had parties and parades at school but it was really all about the candy for my sister and I. We did have a jack o lantern and I guess we helped with the creating but I sort of remember my dad doing that and us just watching. We probably helped scoop out the seeds but he enjoyed making a scary face and putting a lot of detail into the actual carving. My mom would attempt to get us to eat something nutritious for an early dinner and then we grabbed our big pillowcases and were off.

We usually bought a costume or came up with something from our dress up box which was extensive. I grew up in NJ and the weather was always a challenge. You had to consider that you might need a parka over your outfit or at the very least a rain jacket. One memory in the costume department really stands out...I think I was nine the year I dressed in a Japanese costume which I'm sure is very non-PC now but honestly it was a beautiful gold kimono with a sort of geisha type mask over my face. When I was a kid a costume was not complete unless it had one of those horrible plastic masks that covered your face and was held together with a piece of elastic that wrapped around your head so tightly that your hair hurt all the way down to the roots by nights end. The mask made your face sweat and sat so close to your skin it was hard to breathe and then had tiny slits for eye holes so you could barely see where you were walking. Safety back in 1970 wasn't quite what it is today folks.

Anyway, I had some shoes that were a velvety flip flop style on top with wooden soles that clip clopped when you walked. My dad brought them back from Japan so I was feeling very authentic. The problem was the kimono wrapped very tightly around my legs which meant I had to take very small steps when I walked. My sister was a year younger than me and my brother was five years older so he was the lucky one assigned trick or treat duty. He had a friend who lived on the next street over and we used to avoid walking in front of this particular house on regular days because the family had a great big German Shepherd that barked like there was no tomorrow. But my brother knew the boy so naturally he had us stop there for trick or treating. And do you know, as we were stepping down off of the porch that big giant German Shepherd came barreling out of the house right at me and I tried to run in my very tight around the ankle kimono while wearing wooden soled velvet flip flop style shoes and I did a face plant on the sidewalk. I also developed a fear of German Shepherds that stayed with me for a long long time. Until I was 26 years old in fact and we adopted a mutt that had been abandoned in our neighborhood. A mutt that looked suspiciously like a German Shepherd. I learned to love a German Shepherd.

With my own children the hubs was in charge of trick or treat duty and I stayed home and doled out the loot. When my girls were toddlers we lived in North Jersey. Our neighborhood was really dark and hilly so hubs got quite the workout pushing a double stroller up and down the mountain that was our street. We moved to Maryland during their elementary school years and lived in a neighborhood with cul de sacs and lots of kids. Halloween was a very social thing and the dads used to take the kids around in a big group and again, for my kids, it was all about the candy. There were parties and parades at their school and we carved pumpkins (usually outside with Dad in charge because that's best). And of course part of the Halloween fun was dumping all the candy out afterwards for inspection and to make trades and so hubs and I could see what we might want to eat once they'd gone to bed for the night. Sorry girls!

Last year I wrote a post detailing a very funny incident that occurred around Halloween one year. It involved daughter2 because she and crazy mishap know each other well. You can read that post here if you're so inclined.

In Linda's prompt she did ask two very important questions-

"Do you like candy corn?"

and "What is your favorite Halloween candy?"

I like candy corn as long as I don't overindulge. However I am lacking in self discipline so if a bowl filled with candy corn is sitting in front of me I generally end up eating a few too many. My new favorite way to eat candy corn is to mix it with a jar of peanuts. Tastes just like a Payday which, as it happens, is my favorite candy bar.

Have a safe and happy Halloween weekend everyone!

True Colors

Is anyone tired of seeing pictures of the gorgeous fall colors?

I thought not.

Last weekend we rode out to

Waywayanda and I couldn't resist taking a few photos.

I wrote about Waywayanda in a post last winter and its absolutely beautiful in the fall too.

We had a picnic lunch sitting here which confirmed for me that sunlight hitting water is one of my favorite sights in all the world...

It was an unseasonably warm day and perfect for a walk through the woods...

being ever alert of course so as not to miss this...

or this...

or especially this...

The thing about fall color around here is that its everywhere.

The park was gorgeous but so is the color in my neighborhood...

and in my yard...

and from my family room couch...

'Even if something is left undone, everyone must take time to sit still and watch the leaves turn.' Elizabeth Lawrence

All Good Things...

For the past year I've been playing along with a meme every Wednesday called The Random Dozen. It's hosted by Lid over at 2nd Cup of Coffee and she is ready to wind it down with perhaps a Random now and then but not weekly. I was fairly new to blogging when I stumbled on the RD and I have really enjoyed getting to know lots of bloggers thru these sometimes silly, sometimes serious questions. Lid has decided to send us off on a serious note with just two questions-

1. What scares you the most?

A. Physically

B. Emotionally

How do you cope?

Hmmm, what scares me the most? You mean besides coming up with something to blog about on Wednesdays now that the RD is retired?

Its hard to separate the two types because fear of the physical hits me on an emotional level. I guess I'd say that I truly dislike small, tight, confined spaces and just the thought of being stuck in one makes me breathe hard. I am not a fan of small caves, extremely narrow tunnels, and tightly packed cable cars hanging high atop a valley.

These are typically things you can avoid unless you are part of my adventurous and fun loving family and you live abroad and spend weekends prowling around old cathedrals and estates that are filled with narrow tunnels and stairwells and you spend holidays in the mountains riding in tightly packed cable cars.

How do I cope? I pray because that's how I roll in life. I like to think I have come a long way in the process of plowing headlong into my fears with my family acting as cheerleaders. They encourage me to let go and live life and in doing so I have seen things, learned things, and loved things that I would not have experienced if I'd let fear overwhelm me.

Many lessons were learned in our years spent overseas and I think working thru some of my fears was one of them. Like most parents my biggest emotional fear is something happening to one of my children. But that is something that we have to let go of too. I'm not saying we don't take appropriate measures to keep our children safe but there is much in this world that is not within our realm of control. The older your children get the more you recognize the truth of that statement. And that brings me back to prayer. Which is a good place to be.

2. Robert Frost wrote-

Nature's first green is gold

her hardest hue to hold.

Her early leaf's a flower;

But only so an hour.

Then leaf subsides to leaf.

So Eden sank to grief,

So dawn goes down to day.

And nothing gold can stay

What comes to mind when you read the phrase, "Nothing gold can stay?"

Wow that's depressing.

Isn't it funny how words invoke emotion?

Even without analyzing this just reading it makes me feel gloomy.

I guess the theme I hear is that change is inevitable.

I mean even the weekly Random Dozen isn't permanent.

Oh I know he wasn't referring to an internet meme but it's such a downer I feel the need to inject some light here. How about a few lovely pictures taken while riding up the side of Mt. Blanc in a too tightly packed cable car?

Follow the line down and out.

Do you see the speck that is a cable car?

Some crazies, obviously without ANY fear...

In spite of a few ice crystals the mechanics worked and we did not plunge to the bottom of an ancient glacier in our too tightly packed cable car.

We're free!

and we're above the clouds...

Some of us find it thrilling...

and some of us say, "Talk to the hand!"

You know, I might have missed it.

Facing your fear can be a beautiful thing.

Stuff that bugs and stuff that doesn't-Vol. 2

Welcome to Volume 2 of what may become a weekly entry here. Or it may not. But there is definitely a volume 2. If you missed Volume 1 you can find it here and you'll want to click over because let me tell you, it is riveting.

Okay 'stuff that bugs'-

1. Fog lamps. Why do so many people drive with their fog lamps on in the clear black of night??? You aren't one of them are you? Because if you are I'm not sure we can be friends. If it isn't foggy and you drive with your fog lamps on you 'dazzle' the oncoming driver.

Who besides me loves the word dazzle? I think it was used at least 10 times in my UK driving test. And in the UK its an offense to drive with your fog lamps on if visibility is greater than 100 metres.

Oh that pesky metric system.

And those pesky people who continue to drive with their fog lamps on when it's not foggy or snowing.

2. Do you talk on your mobile phone when you are in a department store restroom stall? Because twice in the last week I've heard conversations from the stall next door. And in the second instance the woman actually shrieked and I thought maybe something was wrong and I was just getting ready to ask thru the stall if everything was okay when I realized she was on her phone. I gotta think there is not enough hand sanitizer in the world to make this behaviour okay.

3. The girl on the treadmill beside me in the gym the other day was drinking a Starbucks while she was walking. On a treadmill. And it was a venti. I was simultaneously horrified and impressed. I was on an elliptical which requires arms and legs so I will not be attempting this plus I'm inclined to think one action has got to negate the other.

4. Speaking of calories...hubs and I went out for Mexican food on Friday evening and I happened to read something in a magazine earlier in the day that was distressing. The author of the article said you could consume about 700 calories before you ever get your meal if you eat the chips and salsa and have a margarita too. His suggestion was for you to choose one or the other.

Uh, no can do.

He also said the best entree options were a beef taco or a chicken enchilada. I went with the enchilada and only ate half of my meal so I'm sure it all evened out in the end.

5. My refrigerator door. Arrggh! I came downstairs one morning last week and pulled open the frig door to get cream for my coffee and a piece snapped right off. Thankfully we bought the extended warranty on this appliance because this is the second repair in a little over a year. Of course the repairman took one look and said he'd have to order the part and it will take approximately six days to get here. And of course hubs and I forget that its broken every time we go to open the door. Every.single.time. Allow me to demonstrate...

The Door from Jo Daley on Vimeo.

I know.

My videography leaves you speechless.

I'll move along.

I cannot leave you with a list of stuff that bugs without including a few things that don't. It's the Pollyanna in me. Here's a few things I'm looking forward to right now-

1. A destination wedding in a lovely city where I can put my toes in the sand and feel the sun on my face.

2. See #1.

Off to the Races

It wasn't a great weekend to be a fan of the sports teams from Philly.

Or the Volunteers from Tennessee.

Sigh.

It was, however, a great weekend for a day at the races.

Who else loves the weekends?

Especially gorgeous golden fall weekends?

Especially gorgeous golden fall weekends where your Saturday is spent at a horse race courtesy of some business blah blah blah connection where you find yourself sitting on a very pretty hillside having a lovely lunch while watching the 90th running of a steeplechase?

Oh and did I mention the weather?

Perfection!

There was a lot of tailgating.

Not sure if all the tailgaters actually watch the races but they do have a lot of fun.

Which is why there are also more than a few of these around.

Here we are at the entry to our space for the day...

Our hosts made it feel more festive with fall tablecloths and beautiful centerpieces....

Food and drinks were available all day beginning with a nice breakfast which was followed up by a nice lunch later in the afternoon.

We had a great view of the track and best of all?

Our own restrooms.

Just keepin' it real people.

I'm not a big fan of the porta potty scenario which entails approximately 50,000 people visiting throughout the day.

If you wanted to place bets on any of the races you could do so right in the tent.

It was all done in support of a local hospital so it was fun for a good cause.

I appear to be seriously studying the race guide.

Actually I had my own system which consisted of something along the lines of-

"This horse has a fun name"

or

"Oooh, pretty silk colors"

Highly scientific.

I'm pretty sure this is how its done at racetracks the world over.

From the hillside you couldn't help gawking but notice a beautiful mansion sitting across the way.

This is Natirar and was at one time the 500 acre estate of the King of Morocco.

It was sold to the local park commission and now a part of the land has been leased to Sir Richard Branson of Virgin Group fame.

He has been developing the property into a hotel/restaurant/spa and they also have a cooking school on the premises.

We heard from others at the race that it was a pretty amazing place and we wanted to check it out on the way home.

Except it took us 90 minutes to exit the parking area.

Yeah.

Seriously ridiculous.

Hello Race Organizers?

We had a fabulous day at your event but next year I think we'll come by helicopter.

Wedded Bliss

We've reached Day 3 of the Blog party hosted by Kimberly's Korner. Day 1 was how you met your significant other, Day 2 your proposal story and today, Day 3, she asks this question-

Is marriage all that you thought it was going to be and how long have you been married? What do you see for your future as a couple?

Ending the week with something light. Ha.

Let's start with the easy part. We have been married for 26 years, 4 months, and 6 days. "Wow", you say. "How can you be so accurate?" It's easy. I have an anniversary timeline on my blog. I added it in the months leading up to our 25th which we celebrated last year in grand style...sitting in our attorney's office signing the papers for our home purchase. We know how to live it up, don't we. I was going to take the timeline down after our 25th but decided I liked to see that number every day. I mean, let's face it, 26+ years is a bit of an accomplishment.

Is marriage all that I thought it would be?

Honestly, I was just shy of 24 when I got married and while I thought I knew everything a lot about what I was heading into, I didn't really know a lot. And in some ways I think that's a good thing. We were both young. We each had a car and a job but no money saved and no real furniture. We started from scratch. We built something together. And that feels good. Really really good.

I'm sure like many young girls I had an idealized picture in my head of what married life would be like. It would be like a fairy tale. The good parts of a fairy tale. And some days its exactly the way I pictured. Hubs coming in from a hard day at the office and me in my apron and pearls with a lovely meal on the table. Well, you know what I mean.

Commitment is sometimes an overused word but in marriage it is key. And not just in committing to each other but in committing to remain married come what may. Maybe married life is more like a fairy tale than it first appears. Don't our favorite fairy tales all contain some dark moments mixed with the bright... struggles of one kind or another?

'In sickness and in health, for richer, for poorer, for better, for worse..." We say those vows on our wedding day but at age 24 we don't really think we'll be sick, poor or 'worse'. The reality of life is that we will have all of that and more. In looking back after many years of marriage I can see that its the very combination of the good and the bad, the rough and the smooth, the easy and the hard, that have made our lives together fuller and stronger and richer...its the ups and the downs we've shared that have united us as a couple. There is a depth to marriage after 20some years that is not there on Day 1. It has to be grown. And for something to grow it needs to be tended and cared for and lovingly looked after on a regular basis. This is true of many things in life but is especially true of a marriage.

What do I see in the future for us as a couple?

We're in a new stage of married life now...an almost empty nest (hubs says its not officially empty until the tuition bills cease and he does have a point) and we're kind of figuring it out as we go along. In the future we hope to settle down south with a home on the water. We both like boating and traveling so there will definitely be some of that. And I hope we can do some good somewhere. And I hope there are grandchildren to play with and spoil. And I hope when I'm 80 and he's 81 that he can still make me laugh. I'm pretty sure the importance of keeping your sense of humor in marriage cannot be overstated.

You've Got a Friend in the Random Dozen

Lid has had one of those weeks so today's Random Dozen questions come to us courtesy of her lovely co-hostess, another Linda. That would be Mocha with Linda as opposed to 2nd cup of Coffee Linda. They're like the James Taylor/Carole King of random dozen question writing. And no, you do not need to be named Linda to play along. Just answer the questions on your own blog then link back to Lid's (2nd Cup) for show and tell.

1. Do you prefer to read the book or see the movie?

Read the book. Definitely read the book.

2. What is your favorite holiday and why?

Thanksgiving. It's all about family and food and feeling grateful. I love Christmas but the holiday itself comes with a certain amount of expectation and stress which sometimes makes it hard to focus 100% on the real meaning of the season.

3. Which do you like better-the mountains or the beach?

Hmmm, which do I like best? My left hand or my right? I love both but if you make me choose I'll have to say the beach.

4. If money were no consideration, what vehicle would you drive?

I love my current vehicle. For some reason it seems odd to write the make of my car on here (like my whole life isn't already an open book for the whole world to read) but I think I'll just leave it at 'my current vehicle'. A little mystery is always a good thing don'tcha think?

5. What is your favorite cold weather beverage?

A cup of tea. It warms me up and calms me down. It simultaneously soothes and inspires. It provides comfort after hard work and energizes me to carry on. A cup of tea is so much more than a drink.

6. How do you communicate most often with your friends: phone, email, text, face-to-face or Facebook?

e. all of the above

With my away friends its mostly by email and facebook with an occasional phone call thrown in for good measure. With local friends its a combination of all of those listed although I don't do a lot of texting with friends. Unless we're trying to meet up someplace and then we might text a simple message. I do a lot of texting with my family throughout the day. And when it comes to young adult children, sending a text has been proven to generate a more immediate response than any of the other methods. Just sayin'

7. How do you receive your mail-mailbox on the porch, at the end of the driveway, down the street or post office box?

In my inbox.

Oh you mean my 'mail' ?

Our mailbox is at the end of our driveway.

8. Of the four basic personality types-sanguine, phlegmatic, melancholic and choleric-which is your strongest and which is your least evident? If you're not sure what the personality types mean you can find out here.

Strongest-phlegmatic

Least evident-choleric?

I see some of myself in all four types. I took a little online quiz and came up as a nurturer. Isn't that a much nicer word than phlegmatic? Who else thinks sinus infection when they hear that word?

9. What do you miss the most about being 20?

My abs.

I am not kidding.

10. How long, from the time you get up, does it take you to be ready to walk out the door in the morning?

Roughly an hour but I can be ready in less time if necessary.

11. Who handles the car maintenance and pays the bills in your family?

Hubs handles the car maintenance and the big picture money (retirement, investments, 401K stuff) and I manage the day to day cash flow and household bills.

12. For those in the US, how many states have you visited? For those outside the US how many countries/provinces have you visited.

I have lived in eight US states and visited 22. I've lived in one foreign country. According to my Trip Advisor map I've visited 155 cities in 15 countries. We do love us some travel.

'The traveler sees what he sees. The tourist sees what he has come to see."

G.K. Chesterton