More Spring Break-Ing

I was right to make this a two-poster. I know me. 

The Sunday after the party it rained. Hubs and my son-in-law managed to get the rented u-haul loaded between cloudbursts, no easy feat.  The rain wasn't so much a problem as getting the furniture that was going up the steep part of the hill it needed to climb was a problem. 

But they made it eventually, and then the big guys took the little guys bowling which they loved. 

When we redid the office we downsized from our big desktop computer set up on a huge mahogany desk to a laptop on a simple table that can be moved around as needed. Daughter1 and her hubs needed a desk so we offered them ours and just had to figure out how to move it from Point A to Point B, with point B six and a half hours away. 

Also I'm sure I have pictures of the desk somewhere because it's been in every single house we've owned, but you're not getting them today. 

I asked for quotes on a site called ShipIt and was overwhelmed with how many responses I received. The cost range was enormous, and everyone I chatted with was very nice, but in the end we decided to just rent a u-haul and take it ourselves. We had better control over the timing this way. Also, my son-in-law needed to leave our house for an out of town work assignment so it made sense for us to drive my daughter and her kiddos back home.  Hubs drove the u-haul and I followed with everyone else in our vehicle. 

A six and a half hour trip is easily eight hours when you have a baby on board. Everyone was so good about the long ride, but babies need to eat and change and eat and it all just adds minutes to an already lengthy trip. 

Question-this desk was one of the first pieces of furniture hubs and I bought in the early years of our marriage. We bought it at the furniture mart in High Point NC in 1986, some 37 years ago. Does that make it an antique? 

Nope. Just old lol. To be considered an antique the item must be at least 100 years old. I like to think someday this desk might sit in one of my great grandchildren's homes and then it really will be an antique. 

Besides the big desk we also had a desk chair and a couple of bins we'd been holding for my daughter and son-in-law since they moved overseas, so this was a good way to get all their belongings back to their rightful owner. 

Maybe not all because I do still have an attic full of American Girl Dolls and furniture. Daughter1 and I rifled through some of that while she was here and she can tell you I basically have a Pleasant Company franchise in my attic. Hubs would not disagree. All the dolls we own were pre-Mattel days, the originals. My momma bought almost all of my inventory for my girls when they were growing up and I look forward to passing them down to Little Miss in a few years. 

On top of all those items we had one more thing to move-

When I was about six years old my parents bought a small desk and chair from an unpainted furniture store to go in my room. My dad sanded it, and painted it white, and it was part of my childhood forever. When Daughter1 was about six years old we took the desk from my parent's house, hubs sanded and painted it white, and it was part of her childhood forever too. When we came back from England the movers wrapped it up and that desk sat in our basement under cover for six years, and until last week sat in my attic here for another six. 

The week before the kids arrived hubs got the desk down from the attic, and sanded and painted it. Navy blue this time to fit in the mancub's room. He's turning six soon and life comes full circle in so many unexpected ways. 

I bought new knobs with military planes on them to go with some of the artwork in his room and it all makes me really happy. Also, this picture is not his room. The desk was in the hall waiting to be moved but then the stomach flu hit and it will get there eventually. 

This desk is over 50 years old so well on it's way to becoming an antique. I know my parents didn't pay a lot for it back in the day, but it has surely had a long and useful life. 

Okay, enough about moving furniture. We made the trip to daughter1's house on Monday and had a happy couple of days playing, driving the boys to school on Tuesday, lunch and shopping in the afternoon, and a long late night conversation with my girl because with three kids now those don't happen as often as we'd like. 

Our plan was to leave Wednesday morning, but the terrible awful no good very bad stomach flu struck me first, at 2 AM. No way we could possibly leave on Wednesday. We were hopeful it was a 24-hour thing (it most definitely was not!) but I hung in to make the long drive home Thursday, where I promptly fell back into the bed. Then hubs fell and then daughter1 texted to say three of the four of them had succumbed (not the baby thankfully!) and oy. Ugh. I do not recommend. 

But! It's a new day, a new week, there are new mercies, and we're over the hump, gently easing back into life. 

Which, all things considered, is still so very very sweet. 

Time Passages

In yesterday's Hodgepodge I asked readers what they were doing five years ago, and decided I'd make that more or less the subject of today's post. When not a lot is going on in your corner of the world you have to reach a little for blog content.

After I asked the question it occurred to me that we've been at this whole Corona mess for five long months (feels like years) so I started wondering what we were doing just prior, and decided to take a peek back at that too.

Five months ago...we were in the first few days of everybody stay home !!! Stay far and away from everybody else in the entire world including your own extended family !!! Now in our house we'd been discussing the virus for a solid two months prior as it hit South Korea hard in January. A friend reminded me yesterday how we'd had a conversation back then, so concerned about my daughter and her family, never imagining we'd be in the same boat just a short time later.

Five months ago hubs and I drove home after spending a long weekend with friends in Florida. Things were open when we headed down, but closed by the time we headed home. The shutdown happened almost overnight. We ate lunch at Chick-fil-a coming back and it was only their first or second day of strictly take out. Of course Chick-fil-a is awesome and handled the upheaval like it was no big deal.

I don't know if anyone imagined in March we'd still be slogging through this insanity five months later, yet here we are. Who's over it?

Five years ago...I wrote a post entitled Retirement Day 187. Currently we are in Retirement Day 2000 so I guess time really does fly when you're having fun. By the way, it's going swimmingly.

Except for the pandemic and the unrest across America and the general nastiness online and the no travel-no-houseguests-no making plans, but other than that it's going swimmingly.

Five years ago we took a fun trip up the East Coast to attend a friend's daughter's wedding.

We drove from New Jersey to Prince Edward Island Canada and thoroughly enjoyed eating our weight in lobster rolls, the staggering beauty of Maine and PEI, and in-person time spent with real life friends.

Also, five years ago I apparently still took pictures with a good camera and not just so-so pictures with a phone.

I would so love to jump in the car and take a road trip somewhere new and pretty and not give a thought to hotel cleanliness, gloving up to pump gas, masking up to get out of the car, or doing math to calculate how many gallons of hand sanitizer we'd need for the journey.

Five years ago we sold our house in New Jersey and spent six weeks living with my mama before heading south. I'm sure she was ready for us to take all our stuff and get on with things, but five years later would give anything to have us back in her house for six weeks.

Six days even.
I haven't seen my mom in person since January.

While we were living with my mom our old and beloved dog died. Five years later her name is still mentioned on a fairly regular basis with an ache in our hearts and smiles on our faces.

NJ winters could easily last into summer, but this photo wasn't actually taken in August. I like it though, and it is five years old. This beautiful pup was something else and when she was gone we said we'd never have another. Letting them go is too hard and we travel too much and have too much company and blah blah blah.

About that same time Daughter1 brought a puppy into her Washington State home and now that puppy is a five year old dock diver living his best life on a Carolina lake. Go figure. And his mama is raising our two favorite boys on the other side of the world, which is something else we didn't see coming five years back.

Five years ago we moved from New Jersey to South Carolina. Not to this house, but to a cozy apartment just across the parking lot from Daughter2's cozy apartment. Those were the days!

Well maybe not really 'the days' because it wasn't a huge amount of space, and we were so anxious and excited to get this house built, but also yes it kind of really was 'the days'. Apartment living meant we didn't have to think about home maintenance and repairs, dock maintenance and repairs, boat maintenance and repairs, catching beavers before they destroy the landscaping, and a host of other assorted bits and bobs that go hand in hand with home ownership.

Then again, there were no early morning lake sunrises where the sky turns pink before your very eyes, no magical light dancing on the water, no boating to dinner, no big porches for napping and reading and enduring this weird season that in 2015 we didn't know was coming, and for that I'm grateful.

Five months may have dragged, but five years have flown.
Time is funny like that.

"The best thing about the future is it comes one day at a time." 

attributed to various speakers...true for us all

High Five From The Hodgepodge

Welcome to this week's edition of the Wednesday Hodgepodge. If you've answered the questions add your blog link at the end of my post, then leave a comment for your neighbor on the list. Here we go-

1. Five years ago this month hubs and I relocated from New Jersey to the Palmetto State. What were you doing five years ago this month?

I mentioned we moved, but when I glanced back at my photos I saw a few other things were happening too. I have some thoughts so instead of writing a short answer here I think I'll make this the subject of my Thursday post. Why use fifty words when you can use 250? 

2. What was the last 9-5 job you worked? Tell us about it.

It has been a long time since I've worked a 9-5 job. The last full time job I held was serving as the Director of a local church preschool in the state of Maryland. To put it another way that was four moves ago. 

I loved it though. I remember standing in front of a crowded sanctuary filled with parents, and telling them I was leaving. I got so teary I could hardly speak. It was a job that was well suited to my temperament and training, the people were wonderful, and it was a really nice place to work. 

3. Plead the fifth, high five, take five, it's five o'clock somewhere, or the big 5-0...which number five phrase relates to your life in some way currently? Tell us how.

Hmmm...maybe the big 5-0? I wrote a whole post about that decade here (Check Engine Light), and with another big birthday coming up fast I suppose the calendar turning has been on my mind.  

4. During this season of spending so much time at home, what distractions get in the way of being your most productive? Or have you been extra productive since this whole thing started?

Definitely not standing in the extra productive camp. I need a little pressure to get things done and the past few months have (in a sense) been pressure free. No deadlines, no company coming, no trips  to plan, nothing to shop for...everything feels like it can be done another day.  

I do meal plan, grocery shop, cook, and all the basic household chores get done, but I'm not one of those people who've learned to speak Italian, took up painting, or reorganized their attic just because they've had a lot of time to fill. I'm more of a let's read a book on the porch kind of pandemic survivor. 

5. Give us a list here of your top five anything.

Not sure if this is my top five, but here are five Instagram accounts I enjoy following, all pretty much politic-free. I am so over that side of social media. 

Chateau de Gudanes-the ongoing restoration of an old chateau set in the south of France. 
Cristin Cooper- a semi-local instagrammer sharing southern style, home and all things beauty
Half Baked Harvest-NYT best selling author of HBH Super Simple Cookbook
National Trust -protecting special places and outdoor spaces in the UK
Ruth Chou Simmons-mom to six boys, artist and author, founder of @gracelaced

6. Insert your own random thought here.

Life feels like a whole bunch of random lately, which is maybe why I've been struggling to fill this question #6 space the past few weeks. We had friends come for dinner Tuesday night (on the patio because 2020) and I made a delicious creme brulee for dessert. How's that for random? I use the recipe found here.

Moving Into The Hodgepodge

Welcome to the Wednesday Hodgepodge! Yep, we're still at this nineteen weeks after I brought it out of retirement to carry us through the mostly at-home time we thought was temporary. Hmmm...not feeling so temporary is it? What a world!

If you've answered this week's questions add your link at the end of my post then jump over and leave a comment for the person linking before you on the list. Or everyone on the list if you've got the time. Here we go-

 

1. Last time you moved house? Something you've learned in moving house?

We moved into our current home a little less than four years ago. 

Something I've learned moving house? Well pull up a chair because I've done some moving and I've done some learning. I looked at my blog tags and found I've written somewhere in the neighborhood of 88 posts labeled moving house so obviously a topic close to my heart.

I think the post linked here sums it up quite nicely. 

2. Move mountains, move along, make a wrong move, moved to tears, get a move on, move up, move over, move out of the way, move the deck chairs on the Titanic, move it!...pick one and tell us how it fits your recent circumstances.

Make a wrong move? What is the right move to make in the age of information overload, misinformation, non-expert experts, biased reporting, and so much unknown. 

3. What have you been doing to make yourself move (aka stay fit-active) during these strange times?

Baking doesn't count, does it? 

Yeah. There was a bit too much of that sort of 'exercise' happening in the early days of Corona, but my daughter the bride has us on a plan now and we've been sweating for the wedding side by each on the screened-in porch for the past month. Surely working out in the heat and humidity counts double, doesn't it? It must count double. We're doing a 100 day meltdown via Beach Body and let me just tell you, melt down is an accurate descriptor. 

4. This week's calendar includes celebrations for the following foods-

National Coffee Milkshake Day (Sunday), National Creme Brûlée Day (Monday), National Milk Chocolate Day (Tuesday), National Chicken Wing Day (Wednesday), National Lasagne Day (Wednesday), National Cheesecake Day (Thursday), and National Avocado Day (Friday)

Which one on the list would you be most inclined to celebrate? Which would you be most inclined to skip?

The one I'd most like to celebrate would be National Creme Brûlée Day, but see question #3. If that's off the table I'm going with the avocado because I can make that work with my m.o.b. dress goal. 

I'm most inclined to skip the lasagne. Maybe if you asked me this question in the dead of winter I'd answer differently, but with temperatures near 90 and the humidity making it feel like something more than 90 a plate of lasagne is not at all appealing. 

5. Next week's Hodgepodge lands in August! I know!! Raise your hand if you feel like July flew by in the blink of an eye? Now bid farewell to your July acrostic style. If you don't know what that means click here.

No jetting anywhere, unusual times, loud voices, yearning for hugs and handshakes and in person connections with the people we love...

J-Just
U-Us
L-Loathing
Y-this Yucky virus

6.  Insert your own random thought here.

I am loving this song-

Hodgepodge Questions-Volume 379

Rolling into another week with the Wednesday Hodgepodge. Answer the questions on your own blog, then hop back here tomorrow to share answers with the whole wide world. Here we go-

1. Last time you moved house? Something you've learned in moving house?

2. Move mountains, move along, make a wrong move, moved to tears, get a move on, move up, move over, move out of the way, move the deck chairs on the Titanic, move it!...pick one and tell us how it fits your recent circumstances.

3. What have you been doing to make yourself move (aka stay fit-active) during these strange times?

4. This week's calendar includes celebrations for the following foods-

National Coffee Milkshake Day (Sunday), National Creme Brûlée Day (Monday), National Milk Chocolate Day (Tuesday), National Chicken Wing Day (Wednesday), National Lasagne Day (Wednesday), National Cheesecake Day (Thursday), and National Avocado Day (Friday)

Which one on the list would you be most inclined to celebrate? Which would you be most inclined to skip?

5. Next week's Hodgepodge lands in August! I know!! Raise your hand if you feel like July flew by in the blink of an eye? Now bid farewell to your July acrostic style. If you don't know what that means click here.

6.  Insert your own random thought here.

Seoul Much To Say

Way back when (April to be exact) I was blogging along with the A-Z Challenge and I've decided to go back now and wrap it up with the final eight letters of the alphabet. You'll find the first post in the series here, but in a nutshell my theme was things that delight. 

Delight is my word for the year and it seems whenever I have a word for the year it is apropos to that particular year's life circumstances. Or maybe it's the opposite in that it's not obvious in life's circumstances, but declaring it my word inspires me to seek it out. 

An-y-way...

S is for South Korea

This little punkin and his parents and his soon-to-be born sibling will be setting up their new home on the other side of the world later this summer, and I thought it worth a mention here.  

Nana isn't going with him, but she will definitely come and visit. 

When I tell people my daughter is moving to South Korea I generally get one of two reactions.  A look of horror and disbelief flashes across their face as they whisper 'South Korea??' 

Or they say Oh Wow! What an amazing opportunity for them! What an adventure they will have! 

I'm in the latter camp in case you're wondering. Which is not to say there aren't some hard things to get my head around like the upside down time zone and the fourteen-ish hour flight and the puppy dog coming to live with us for the duration. But mostly I think Wow! What an amazing opportunity  for them! What an adventure they will have!

When I schlepped baby boy's mama across the pond to live at the tender age of fifteen she initially dug in her heels and cried herself to sleep at night. Our move happened so fast and she had been mostly happy in her big American high school. 

Very quickly though she found herself feeling at home in a country not her own. Really at home because one of the first things you learn when you move house or state or country is home is where your people are and there we were. 

She made friends with classmates who were different in many ways but were the same in all the ways that count. 

She became a comfortable traveler...adaptable, flexible, curious. 

She said she wished we'd had more chances to live in more faraway places and now here she is some fifteen years later moving to Asia. 

I want to to go back for a minute and reassure my 43-year old self that you are doing the right thing moving your teenagers from suburban Maryland to a small English village. That you shouldn't worry so much about how these daughters of yours will adjust because they will do so much more than adjust. They will bloom and grow and thrive amidst all the new and different. 

They will thank you for upending their lives and for showing them the world is big but people are people. I want to tell the me back then that fifteen year old daughter will one day make a move to South Korea and scarcely bat an eye. That the years we spent in England helped make her ready for the now. 

Not just ready but eager. Excited. Confident that when God opens a door we need to boldly walk on through. 

My son-in-law is a surgeon in the Army so we've known all year a move would occur, we just didn't know where. For the past year I've been praying specifically for their new home, new neighbors, new assignment. It's possible I may have even prayed once or twice for God to bring them East because they've spent the last five years living way out west.  

Y'all sometimes God gives us exactly what we ask for-ha! 

They are moving East. To the land of ancient history and delicious barbecue. Changdeokgung Palace and the DMZ. Twelve Unesco World Heritage Sites and the breakdancing capital of the world. 

And because there's no escaping ordinary life that will happen too. Play dates and laundry and a new baby to love. Groceries bought and meals prepared. Coffee with friends and church on Sundays. That dance of the familiar helps you feel at home when your feet wobble and your heart jiggles and tears threaten. 

Which they probably will, but my now grown up girl knows they won't last. She'll put down roots and settle in. She will call this new place home because that's where her people are. 

And she will find delight in this new place because that's how her mama raised her. 

Door

Continuing with the 31 Days To Telling Your Story Challenge with prompts by Kate Motaung over at Five Minute Friday.

Today's prompt-door

Back in 2012 I was participating in a month long photo challenge and one of the word prompts was door. I remember writing that post (you can read it here) and how much I enjoyed looking back at some of the doors hubs and I have walked through in our married life. We'd had eight homes by then and have added two more doors to the mix since.

I guess we never stop opening doors.

I liked that post. Writing out our moves in timeline form helped me see with the clarity of hindsight how one seemingly random place we called home was not so random after all. How one stop in the road of life taught us things, grew us up, made us ready for the next.

Almost two years ago we walked through door number ten.

This house.

The one we could only imagine would stand where the trees grew thick and the red clay ran deep.

The one we built from the ground up.

We live here now.
It's home.

Two years ago we opened the door and once again invited change into our lives, perhaps more change than any move we'd made previously.

Location, lifestyle, people, circumstance.

Most of the pictures I take here are from the back side of my house because the view is lovely there. You see that's the thing about doors, both the literal and the proverbial...

You have to open them to know what's on the other side.

And wherever that door leads you...well as they say round here, you'll need to sit a spell. Put your feet up, pour some coffee, catch your breath.

Of all the many moves we've made, I've probably resisted this last one the most. I blame it on mid-life, the empty nest, this unsettled feeling I have most days of not knowing quite who I am in this new season of life.

So I write about it, and it helps. I read what I wrote in seasons past and rest in the knowledge God is still teaching me things.

Still growing me up.

Still making me ready to swing wide the doors in front of me and walk on through. 

Everybody Wants To Rule The World

In this week's Hodgepodge we were asked to sum up our 20's in one sentence. I found it nearly impossible to sum up a decade filled with more change than perhaps any other in my life in one measly sentence, and decided instead I would need a whole blog post. So here we are.

I mentally scrolled through the years and took inventory of what all transpired in my life between the ages of 20 and 30, and while I remember it as chock-a-block full of fun, new experiences, and a mostly light heart some of the biggest decisions of my life were also made in this decade. Those decisions included who I would marry, what sort of career I would have, when should we start a family, and where do we want to be in ten years.

Actually that last bit we probably didn't think about as intentionally as we tell our 20-somethings now to do, but if you'd asked us back then our answer would have been simple and straight forward. We wanted to be moving forward. Always moving forward. Ahead of where we are now. That was our expectation and I think it's safe to say most of our friends had similar expectations.

We wanted a house, children, meaningful work, and a thriving marriage. The way to make that happen was nose to the grindstone, work-save-throw in some fun, but definitely keep your eye on the ball with the ball being your future.  Now that might sound predictably boring but I assure you it was not. It was a million happy-hard-hilarious-humbling moments that grew us into the people we are today.

Here's my 20's in a nutshell-

Met hubs
fell head over for his devilish charm and the way he made me laugh
graduated from university
working girl
married and moved-new city
moved and married-new city and state
bought first house-new city only
preggers
bought second house
moved-another new city and state
birthed a baby who today has a baby
and surprise! moved-still another new city and state

I was looking for some pictures to include and y'all we just have so many awful pictures from those years. The people are far away and teeny tiny or out of focus and their eyes are red or closed or rolled sideways. And there's a lot of junk in the pictures. Why didn't we ever neaten up the table beside us or the floor in front of us or wait until that random stranger exited the shot?

Because we just didn't. People who took the time to do that when I was in my 20's were called professional photographers.

I worked and had three different employers in my chosen profession in my 20's but I loved this assignment best-

I was a speech pathologist in a public school setting (a preschool) and it was rewarding on so many levels. It might have been three decades ago but I still remember nearly every child from that particular school placement.

On a lighter note I wore bows in my 20's. If your 20's were the same decade as my 20's you likely wore bows too. This particular bow was not attached to the blouse either. You could buy them separately kind of like we do now with scarves, and tie them on any old blouse or top. This picture also reminded me of my love for electric rollers which I used every morning before work way back when.

Also I miss my 20-something skin. Carry on.

1985-Washington D.C. on the 4th of July. A whole lot is going on with that group behind us but maybe you didn't notice because you were distracted by the size of my glasses? It was really hot this particular day which might explain why all those boys in the backdrop have their shirts off.

My girls have seen a picture of me in this outfit and ask if I still have it because rompers are once again a thing. For the record I do not. Hubs and I had been married one whole entire complete year in this picture. I loved being married. I was never that girl who wondered if she wanted to be married or not.

Hubs and I share a birthday month and I found these two pictures taken at my mom's house the year I turned 26 and hubs turned 27. Look how excited we are to be getting a STEAMER!!

And a BBQ GRILL!!  

We're not acting either. We were genuinely thrilled because we didn't go out and buy non-essentials for ourselves in our 20's. We asked for those things for birthdays and Christmas and our families generously obliged. Many meals were cooked on that Weber grill, and it lasted nearly 20 years.

I guess I don't need to point out that tanning was a thing in my 20's. Real sun, not sunbeds or salons but still my 50-something self wishes I'd slathered on a little more SPF back in the day. I'm also loving that stereo cabinet in the background of this picture. Technology didn't move at the speed of light like it does today so adding anything new to your home technology wise was kind of a big deal. I don't remember what year my parents bought that, but I can tell in this photo it's still pretty new.

And here I am 4 months pregnant-

I was working full time and when I wasn't working I'm pretty sure I was sleeping. Hubs would say some things never change-ha! That pup lying beside me is the first dog hubs and I had as a married couple because getting a dog is mandatory in your twenties. She was abandoned as a puppy, left behind our house, so she had a few 'issues'.

You maybe can't tell from the picture but she was still figuring out how to behave indoors. AHEM. She loooved to chew things...the carpet, the arm of the sofa, the linoleum in the laundry room... yeah. Wasn't sure we were going to survive her puppy years, but of course we did and she lived and was loved to the ripe old age of 16 so well beyond our 20's.

Now here's that baby I mentioned-

People sometimes see a picture and say wow that feels like only yesterday, but when I look at this it feels like a lifetime ago. Maybe that's because baby girl has a baby of her own now or maybe it's because it really was a lifetime ago. Let's see if this next sentence makes your head spin like it did mine-

My daughter is 8 months old in this picture and I'm the age she is now. Huh???

I look so happy in this picture and I'm pretty sure it's because I was. So happy. Motherhood was everything I imagined it would be and a thousand things more. The sweet soft essence of the baby girl in this photograph is still so real and present in the grown up woman she is today. God is good like that.

My 20s were a decade of enormous growth and change, but I'm not sure I ever acknowledged that while I was actually in my 20s. I was always just doing the next thing which I think is pretty good advice for anyone struggling in any season of life. Do the next thing. In my 20's that meant finishing college, graduating, getting married, having babies, raising babies.

There is one thing that rings true in every decade of my life and it's that God always makes me ready for the 'next thing' with the 'what's now'.

In my 20's the 'what's now' was a whole lot of change. Change has most often been the medium God uses (and continues to use) to accomplish His purposes in me. I'm always resisting a little or a lot, but in the end there's a very deep sense of gratitude for the roads He's led me down.

In my 20's those roads were filled with so much new. A husband and baby for sure, but other relationships too- friends, jobs, neighbors. My 20's found me navigating new places too, and figuring out how things are done in different parts of the country. I had to extend myself often when what I really wanted was to pull the covers over my head. As a result I grew in confidence, discipline, intention, and most of all faith, which as it happened were all things I would be needing in later decades.

While I didn't take note of everything I was learning in the moment one thing that was crystal clear to me before I hit 30 was this-whatever road I'm on I am never alone. There is grace for the day and strength to be had for the asking.
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One of These Things Is A Lot Like The Other

Note: I wrote this post late Thursday, then saw the word prompt for Five Minute Friday. Adding my link to the group there too. Visit Kate Motaung's blog and see what other writers had to say. Better yet, why not share your own five minute entry?  Today's prompt-Mom

As I was reading Hodgepodge answers yesterday I realized I didn't answer part two of question one, which basically asked how my experience as a mom was different than my own mother's experience. And since it's almost Mother's Day I thought I'd expand on that a little.

That's me with my mama. I guess I really am a brunette-ha! And apparently my obsession with beautiful weather started early.

I've been a mother for almost thirty years now, but when I think about Mother's Day it's my mother who comes to mind first, as opposed to my own role as mom. I know I'm so fortunate to have my mother still in my life, in my girl's lives, and soon in my grandson's life. Her first great grandchild. Course logistics are nuts, but we will find a way to introduce them face to face, and I know she's looking forward to that.

Me too, but this post is about her not me.

My mother loved us well. Really that is the thought that looms largest in my mind when I think about my mother. I have never once in all my life doubted the sureness of my mother's love. What a wonderful legacy and one I hope my children claim some day.

When I think about how our experiences differ a few things come to mind, but also a lot of similarities too. My mother raised four children and I raised two, so there's that. And she had a son which is not something I can speak to, although I will have a grandson which I know will stir up all sorts of new feelings in me.

My mom was a mostly stay at home mom and I was mostly a stay at home mom. We both worked off and on as our children grew, my mom as a librarian and me as a speech pathologist and later a teacher. We've both spent much of our adult lives volunteering in some capacity as well.

Back when I was in elementary school my mother was the phone chairperson for our area Christian Women's Club. I'm pretty sure her official title wasn't phone chairperson, but that's what we called it because she had to spend a lot of time on the phone taking reservations for a monthly luncheon, and handling some of the details. Probably more to it than that, but to a child's mind that was the gist of it.

No such thing as the Internet back in the day, so no online reservations or emailing information or avoiding human contact. It was all done the old fashioned way, and for you 'kids' reading here today, that would be a telephone attached to a wall that you dialed and that sometimes rang busy so you'd have to keep dialing until the busy signal quit.

And you had to talk to people when they answered because they mostly answered. We didn't screen calls and there was no voice mail. In fact I don't remember anyone having an answering machine of any kind, so conversation happened. Sometimes long conversations that had nothing to do with why you were calling. I remember we bought my mom  a little telephone for her charm bracelet that year because it seemed so fitting.

One of my favorite things as a school aged child was having my mother as room mom for my class. My younger sister was just one grade behind me, so she alternated from year to year whose room she volunteered in, but I loved it when she was in mine. She also dedicated countless hours of her life to filling various volunteer positions in our church and those are both things I enjoyed doing as a wife and mom too.

My mom was a military wife and moved a lot in her married life. I've moved numerous times as well,  so we have that in common. I think we both enjoy homemaking and handled picking up and setting down somewhere new pretty well. We would not call ourselves brave, but we can be when a job transfer calls for it.

My mother is an avid reader and was and still is a wonderful cook. Those are both activities I learned at her knee, and still enjoy. My girls also share a love of books and being in the kitchen too, and this makes my heart so happy.

My mother has an artist's eye and a gardener's green thumb. Alas I do not. I think these are things I associate with the role of homemaker because they were so much a part of my own mother and my childhood memories. In my head I have an artists eye and a gardener's green thumb, but in practice not so much. My mom has a way with flowers and can plop a bunch of blooms in a vase and they look amazing. I plop the same bunch and they just look plopped. Things grow in her yard and when I ask her how she says she didn't do anything special to make it happen. My mom sets a gorgeous table and irons linens like a pro. I do love a beautifully set table, but fall more into the 'good enough' category when it comes to ironing. My mother has made beautiful scrapbooks over the years too and while I try I never quite match her skill in those areas.

We both love shoes which has nothing to do with mothering, but seemed worth mentioning anyway.

My mother established so many wonderful family traditions around the holidays, and I think we're alike in that way. We want to make special occasions feel special and we both probably cling a little too tightly to some of that, but we're learning. We've both loosened the reins there in recent years, and Christmas still comes and it's still marvelous.

And we still bake too many cookies because some traditions are meant to be held tightly forever and ever amen.

Technology. This is one of the ways our experiences have differed, but more as we parent adults rather than small children. She didn't have to deal with a lot of technology in raising children, and even my generation mostly bypassed the craziness parents today have to navigate. When I was a kid we had a couple of phones in the house, and four channels on the TV. I don't remember it being a big deal, and although a couple of my friends had a phone in their bedroom, we never did. Even the friends with a phone in their room still shared the same line with the rest of the family, so not really 'your own phone'.

Social media was in its early stages when my girls were in high school and college so technology wasn't a huge deal in the heavy parenting years. Unless of course you count me trying to understand how it works-ha! My mom has email but uses it sparingly, and she loves to read my blog so at least she has her priorities straight.

My mom and I like to talk about spiritual things. We pray for our families, pouring out all the fear and worry, hope and gratitude, we feel for our children and our children's children, and in that way we are are very similar. I enjoy conversations with my mom about scripture or discussing something I've read in a book or puzzled over with my ladies Bible Study group. My mom thinks I'm a good mother and I appreciate that so much, even on the days it's not true.

Especially on the days it's not true.

My mom has been a superstar grandmother and has showered her grandchildren with love, prayer, and quality time. This is something I hope we share as I join the world of grandparenting this summer.

I think all mothers feel they've managed some aspects of parenting well, and some areas less so. There's regret over situations or seasons with our children where a mother wishes she could get a do-over, one more chance to make everything perfectly perfect. I feel that myself as a mother, but as a daughter?

As a daughter I never expected my mother to be perfect. Her love for me was perfect and that's always been enough.

And in that way I hope I'm exactly like her.
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The Happy Hodgepodger

Happy Hodgepodge everyone! It's nice to be back on the blog today. If you've answered this week's questions add your link at the end of my post, then run say hello to your neighbor. Here we go-

1. Let's all think happy thoughts...share one of yours here.

I know you think I'm predictable, and that my happy thought is the fact we're finally in the new house, but it's not. I mean that is most definitely a happy thought, but there's still so much to do that it's a happy thought followed by thoughts that are a little less than happy. Also I've caught a cold. 

Wait-I'm supposed to be thinking happy thoughts! 

Here's one... I'm really looking forward to having my mom, my sister and her family, my youngest daughter, and some lake friends here for Thanksgiving dinner. Thanksgiving is my favorite, and this crowd will all see past the boxes. 

Once I'm a little more settled and we have a few things on the walls I'll do a whole happy house post, k? 

2. There's a Chinese proverb that says, "If you want happiness for an hour take a nap, if you want happiness for a day-go fishing...." What say you? If you want happiness for a day _____________.

Stay off social media-ha! Actually I think fishing is a pretty good answer, along with a hike in the woods, a boat ride, or getting lost in a good book. 

3. Where do you go to decompress from the world around you?

The woods or the water always do it for me. 

4. What song never fails to make you happy?

Lots! Going with the first few that popped into my head-More Today Than Yesterday by Spiral Staircase, Summertime's Callin' Me by The Catalinas, Sugar Pie Honey Bunch by The Four Tops, Do You Believe in Magic by The Lovin' Spoonful...

5. Wednesday is National Fast Food Day. Should that be a thing? Apparently it is, so tell us what's the last 'fast food' you consumed? If you were putting together your own version of a 'happy meal' what would you include?

I feel like maybe it shouldn't be a thing, but everything is a thing now, right? The last 'fast food' I consumed was a southwest grilled chicken salad from Chick-fil-a. 

My own happy meal would probably include a warm soft Brie with crackers, prosciutto, an assortment of olives, peppadews, nuts and a chilled bottle of champagne. Fast food isn't really my thing. 

6. In a few sentences tell us why you blog.

Mostly it's because I like to write, and a blog is a place to do that on a regular basis (unless you're moving, in which case you become a slacker in the blogosphere). Along the way I've found blogging helps me hit pause now and then, to find beauty in the small things. I love connecting my words with my memories and I've learned a lot about myself on This Side of the Pond. I know blogging isn't what it once was, but I still enjoy it and have no plans to quit. 

7. List seven things you're feeling especially grateful for today.

My husband who takes care of so many things around here, Internet in the house (whoohoo!), FaceTime with grown up daughters who are smart, kind, and passionate about the world around them, She Reads Truth devotionals in my morning inbox, my mom who is always just a phone call away, forgiveness, and my brand new super comfy bed. Just keepin' it real with that last one. This cold has knocked me for a loop. 

8. Insert your own random thought here.

I thought I'd show you the 'mixing bowl' today, but first let's talk about the cabinet because it's one of my favorite things in the house.  My decorator found it in an antique shop and our cabinet guy distressed and painted it for me. He did a beautiful job. 

If you don't know what I'm talking about when I say 'mixing bowl' click here.  The bowl is actually called an offering bowl, but I knew if I told hubs that up front he'd think it was crazier than the mixing bowl so I kept mum. He loves the sink btw. 

I have stacked stone tile on one wall only, and am really happy with the way it turned out. 

That picture is a little dark but it was evening and I had trouble getting the right lighting for a photo. 

And this one is an awkward angle, but my ceilings are high and I had trouble getting all the pieces in one shot. Everything is in proportion in real life. 

You're used to my photography, right? 

I love the light fixture. Initially I was going to have two sconces, but once we found the mirror we decided to go with a hanging lantern in an antique silver finish. I have a recessed light in the ceiling too, so in spite of what these pictures suggest the lighting really does work well. 

The powder room is in great shape and when all these boxes and the laundry (sheets and towels from storage-have mercy!) get to be too much for me I sometimes go in there and hide soak it all in. 




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