Tuesday, April 2, 2013

B is for Brown Paper Bag


I've got a theme, and it's this-

Blogging my way out of a brown paper bag

Literally.
See this bag-


This bag stresses me out. It's full of pictures from any and every year in the past 25 (or more) and I periodically pull it out in an attempt to organize, file or chuck. What actually happens though, is I get sidetracked looking at the pictures. Before I know it there's a mess on the kitchen table and its time to make dinner, so back into the brown paper bag they go as I vow to deal with them another day.

April is another day. At the end of the month this bag will be empty, the photos will be filed or thrown away, and twenty five of them will be blogged about. I'm not sure yet which 25, but like a magician who reaches for the rabbit in a hat, I hope to put my hand in this bag and pull out something a little bit magical.

Because motherhood?
It is magical.

When I peek inside this bag I see motherhood in all her multi colored glory. Sometimes  blurry and often sloppy, but also full of tender moments and God's grand design.

So here's my plan...grab an envelope, grab a picture, and go.  In order to give it some structure and meet the A-Z requirements of the challenge I've decided on the ABC's of motherhood.  Something I've learned or something I've tried to impart to my children.  I like being a mother. I like to write about the many things I've learned from my children and the experiences we've shared together. I like using pictures to frame a  post and I think we can all agree my blog is nothing if not random so here we go-

B is for Brown Paper Bag


Could we have squeezed one more object into this shot?  I think not.

Somebody snapped this picture on Daughter1's 2nd birthday.  She's the blonde headed beauty in the polka dotted dress. I'm the one with the big stomach, 7 months pregnant living in a house without air conditioning.  Hubs is the guy who in a few minutes will be wishing this wagon had come fully assembled, and that's my mother in law in the birthday hat looking on. More family had come to the party that day, and half a sister is caught at the edge of this photo.

This picture is busy.  It's messy and imperfect.  It was taken with an Instamatic camera whose film had to be developed and the results of which you didn't see until days, weeks, or even months later.  Cameras were pulled out on special occasions...birthdays and Christmas and family vacations. In 1990 cameras weren't picked up several times a day. We missed capturing small moments and great light on film, but we were very present as they happened.

If I were taking this picture today I'd look through my lens and say, wait...somebody take that wrapping paper to the trash, and slide the unwrapped boxes to the back. I'd ask my sister to scoot her chair out of the picture, and I'd fold up the small seat sitting front and center. I'd say don't get me in the shot because I'm exhausted and hot and feeling every bit the mother of a 2 year old with a baby on the way.  I'd neaten, focus, lighten, and crop.

I have a bag full of pictures like this one.  They are pulled from an envelope unfiltered and what I see when I look at this photograph and more like it, is a real day in the life of a mother.

I love my fancy Canon with the big lens.  I love that I can take hundreds of pictures and delete those deemed something less than perfect.  In reality though, I think motherhood is more Kodak Instamatic, less Canon Rebel.

Motherhood is raw and unfiltered. It's messy and imperfect. It's hot and tired with a smile on her face. It's keep going when you really want a nap.  It's a backyard patio filled with wrapping paper trash and a grandmother wearing a birthday hat. It's the aggravation of an unassembled toy on a hot June day. It's do it again, push me higher, sing me a song, arms reaching up, weight in your lap.

There's no delete.
Every moment counts and many are less than perfect.

Dear Moms in the Trenches-less than perfect is okay.  

In fact it's more than okay. When did we mothers start thinking perfection was the standard of the job?  Children don't demand it and anyway, it's not possible. Motherhood is getting up every day and doing the best you can because you love these little people in a way that defies logic. It's forgive a lot, teach a lot, laugh a lot. It's nurture, correct, focus.

Like an old fashioned camera we can't know how this picture we're taking will all turn out until sometime later.  I do know this...like a birthday party on a warm June day, where the guest of honor is an adorable, slightly stubborn two year old, it will be perfectly imperfect.

41 comments:

  1. Joyce, you sometimes give me something to reflect on, to remember, or to re-think, but always you give Joy! Thank you for sharing this special gift of expression and thought with which you have been so richly blessed. I look forward to the next ABC.

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  2. awww i loved this so much joyce, it brought a tear to my eye <3

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  3. I loved this so much! I think this will be a great theme and I can't wait to read more. I think that picture is just wonderful. It captures so much more than a tidied, perfect setting ever could. love you!

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  4. The memories are just as beautiful, regardless of what camera, or lens, or how it's posed. Isn't it strange to see yourself so pregnant - and with different hair? My pics about that same time SCARE me cuz I was the queen of the perm! ha!

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  5. Loved your A-Z last year and this one looks to be another good one. Can't wait for tomorrow's edition.

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  6. So true, motherhood comes with everything thrown in and at us.

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  7. Great post Joyce. I love the picture and I have a box of photos I need to do the same thing with.

    Looking forward to seeing what else you find.

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  8. I think you have picked a really good theme (and a perfect way to get through you bag of pictures). I have a similar bag (or 2) of pics and some of my favorites are those not so perfect ones that would get deleted with today's cameras.

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  9. How profound - but then that's what we've come to expect from you. ;-)

    I have a large box of photos ... that I vow that I'll get organized and sorted, but I'm not sure if/when that will ever happen.

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  10. Joyce- you live my life. Even the paper bag. But you write it so much more beautifully than I. Or anyone else for that matter! I LOVE visiting here and reading.

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  11. wow, this brought a tear to me - I know I will totally enjoy all that you find to write about in this challenge. Great theme!

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  12. Love. I have a 6 year old and two-2 year olds. Life right now is smiles, chaos, sticky fingers, tantrums and appreciating the tiny wonderful moments that will pass too quickly. So glad I found your blog! I love the idea of going through the bag. Mines the size of a closet right now...too much to even look at. Good luck! =)

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  13. I love your theme and can't wait to see what other gems you find along the way!

    (Grover at Inane Ramblings)

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  14. This is a post dear to my heart. What a great concept. This reminds me of all the boxes and bags I have around the house to sort through. Maybe I should consider this theme for the next A to Z. At least it's one way to do some neglected housecleaning.

    Great photo too! What a wonderful story prompt you have here.

    Lee
    Wrote By Rote
    An A to Z Co-host blog

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  15. Ooohhhh great theme!

    My 'brown paper bag' is in the form of a storage bin. Ugh. Although I do love to sift through a pile of photos. So much more fun than scrolling through them on the computer.

    Good luck!

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  16. Loved this post. Loved your take. I too have a brown paper bag or two needing some attention. Thank you for lighting a fire under me to address them before this year is out.

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  17. Joyce, I can't begin to tell you how much I enjoy when you write from your heart about being a mother and what it means to you. You truly have a gift! So much of what you share I can relate to on a very personal level.

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  18. Nice memories and well said. I have a large box of photos as well. Some are yellow with age. I hope I age as well.

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  19. Wow, I love this post...especially the part about motherhood being more instamatic than Canon Rebel. While not a mom myself I would say that this is true of life in general. Messy, imperfect, and beautiful.

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  20. OMG! How I LOVE this post! Just reading about a moment in YOUR motherhood sent me back to a moment of MINE and the cascade of memories engulfed me in all the sweetness of watching my own "little one" grow into a man at 24 while managing to tower head and shoulders over me. How was I lucky enough to be blessed with such a gift?

    Thanks for this touching reminder for us to hold close all those perfect moments...and the not so perfect ones as well...;~)

    Donna L Martin
    www.donasdays.blogspot.com

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  21. What you describe is so familiar! It is a life worth living.

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  22. What a wonderful theme and double-duty resolve to get through your paper bag. Sounds like a full-time to scan, organize, select, blog, and toss. Especially when there are so many Kodak moments to pore over. Can't wait to "C" what you pull out for the next letter;).

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  23. LOL...you have a bag, I have a closet! I begin to clean it out---photos, school projects, report cards etc. My kids are twenty-five and twenty-one. But it's so hard to get rid of their childhood treasures. But like you, what doesn't fit, has to go. Great post and I'll be back tomorrow. :)

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  24. I LOVED this post. You captured the truth of it all soo perfectly. I "wish" I had just a bag of photos. I have boxes and boxes and bags and envelopes and more in weird little places. Years and years of life stuffed in boxes (OK, there are a few albums, but not many). I am always going to do it, but it just never seems to happen. Like you I get lost in the memories and hours go by. How right you are, nothing was perfect at the time, but the memories and the moments are. Soo glad I am following you now, I know I am going to enjoy it!

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  25. Look at you, all preggers! ;)
    I absolutely love that picture!

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  26. I have a big, deep cupboard of disorganized pictures instead of a brown bag.

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  27. What a great idea. Most of my photos are online. I was an avid scrapbooker until I went back to work 3 years ago. Now I am so behind (although you have made me feel better). I miss the days of the imperfect photo. I think we miss a lot with the ability to delete as we go.

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  28. Wonderful! I loved your post and can't wait to read more. I take tons of photos but keep them all even the imperfect ones. Good luck with the rest of the A to Z challenge!

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  29. Love the pg tummy! Awww.

    The serendipitous thing is that I have started plugging through my own brown bags and boxes. Since I am a grandma, my collection is way beyond yours. Some of the photos make me cry, as I see my late parents and brothers as healthy young people.

    Thanks for your post. It is precious.

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  30. Ugh. I'm terrible about taking pictures - or doing anything with them when I do take some.

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  31. This post is beautiful and the picture was absolutely adorable. Using the Challenge as a way to make yourself go through the brown paper bag is sort of genius too.

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  32. This is a wonderful post Joyce! I love it! It speaks your heart and I love the way you compared the Instamatic and Canon. And the picture is precious- depicts real life!
    until next time...nel

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  33. Well, you have sure set the bar high with this post for the remainder of your month of posts. But, I have no doubt that they will all be just as enjoyable. You have such a gift of writing. Looking forward to tomorrow's entry.

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  34. Love this post and the whole idea - cant wait to read the rest :-)

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  35. I really enjoyed this post. I am really excited that I found your blog through the challenge, I can just tell already. I really love reading about other mother's and their experiences with motherhood. I often remind myself that I need to remember to be present in the now, instead of tucked behind a camera lens. Can't wait to see what you have in store for the challenge!

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  36. Oh, my goodness. I have a Rubbermaid TOTE of pictures. Most of them are 'only' from 1994 - 2013. I actually managed to put the early years (1974 - 1993) into albums back in 1993. You had me smiling :-)

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  37. I remember (not so fondly) those instamatic cameras--some of which sat in a drawer for months or years before we had the money to develop them. I recently went through the thousands of slides we took back in the 80's. Then I bought a gadget to turn them into digital images, but most of the quality is gone after so many years. Good on you to be going through that bag--enjoy your month full of memories!
    tm

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  38. I'm glad I am getting in on the beginning here. Great post and I have many loose pics in boxes, bags, and on shelves. I always get distracted by looking at them. So many memories. Look forward to reading this month.
    I find my iPhone camera perfect for catching a lot of the moments.

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  39. That is such a busy, crowded, perfect picture. I love looking at old photos, and all the memories they bring back. It is amazing how one small thing can make you remember so much!

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  40. I pulled out all my old (pre-digital-cameras) photos and scanned a bunch of them for the A to Z Challenge...mine is all the overseas places I've traveled to, and it's been so much fun to look back at the memories.

    www.marie-everydaymiracle.blogspot.com

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  41. What a great idea! Lovely photo and lovely story.

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