Tuesday, August 31, 2010

How not to be a blubbering mess and other stuff I learned this weekend

Daughter1 has been home all weekend and I have to take her to the airport today. Daughter2 wasn't able to join us this time round because classes have started and she's knee deep into the books. At least I hope she is. Anyway, it's been so nice having my girl home...there is just something about seeing my grown up child sleeping in her own bedroom and sitting at the dinner table that warms my heart. We do not get enough of that but we try to make the most of it when it happens so we packed a lot into our weekend. I learned a few things too...

1. Grown up boys conversations with their friends are not that different from grown up girls conversations. We went to a local baseball game on Friday night and a group of 20-something boys were seated behind us. They never stopped talking. Seriously. They kept a running conversation going the entire 9 innings. In between trash talking the at bat player they covered girls looks with some particularly disturbing references to weight. And they had some harsh things to say about facebook photos which are not an accurate portrayal of said girls, hence the term facebook fakeout. Essentially this means posting pictures of yourself which were taken when you were 10 or maybe 40 pounds lighter than you are irl or wearing dark sunglasses so nobody can actually see your face. Women just cannot escape their insecurities. Sigh. The boys also discussed their employers, their cash flow and how much their mama does or does not do for them which, surprise surprise, was either too much or too little. I was a little bit tired by the time they left.

2. Will Ferrell movies are made with men in mind. We went to see The Other Guys on Saturday afternoon. Eh.

3. When it comes to hygiene, health care, and longevity the 21st century rocks. We watched the finale of Pillars of the Earth on Saturday night and let me just re-state for the record how happy I am to only read about the Middle Ages or see it re-created for television. I for sure would not have wanted to live back then. Shudder. That being said I do think about the care and craftsmanship and all the sweat and blood and tears that went in to building some of the worlds most beautiful cathedrals and I sort of wish we had a bit of that when we build churches today. I know a church is all about the people but the act of building a cathedral was about far more than just slapping some bricks together. Read Pillars of the Earth.

4. I need to Practice saying the Pledge of Allegiance in my head. I realized on Saturday that I am going to be a blubbering mess when my girls walk down the aisle one day. We attended a wedding on Sunday afternoon which was lovely. It was an absolutely gorgeous day with crystal clear blue skies and lots of sunshine and my girl home. As we stepped out of the car at the church I could already feel tears threatening.

Daughter and the bride's sister became fast friends the day they met...the first day of preschool, age three, circa 1991. And here they are today...

The bride is her older sister and they are the daughters of friends we have known since we lived in NJ the first time. When we met the bride she was 6. We had dinner with her parents a few weeks ago and my hubs grilled the dad J as to how he would handle all the emotion of the day. This is something my hubs worries about. A lot. He's pretty sure he'll need medication to hand his girls over to 'some boy'. Anyway, J laughed and told my hubs he wasn't a bit worried about his emotional state on the day.

As he walked his daughter down the aisle I somehow accidentally locked eyes with J and he told us later that until that moment he was fine. But when he looked at me and saw my daughter and hubs standing beside me the years just rolled back and he saw his daughter as the little girl she was when we all hung out together and that's when the tears came. We had much discussion in the car about how to keep it all together on our own girls wedding days and daughter1 informed us that you're supposed to say the pledge of allegiance under your breath to keep from sobbing. Trust me, I've filed that piece of information away for later.

5. Cotton candy adds whimsy to any event. The reception was completely amazing. Oh. my. word. We thought the cocktail reception buffet with its sushi station, pasta station, antipasti station, raw bar, pizza and bruschetta station, Asian station, and everythingunderthesun station was the main event. After an hour we were escorted into another beautiful room where we were served dinner. What??? Didn't we just have dinner??? Then, at about 10:30, our server leaned into our table and informed us that we had the best seat in the house for the dessert event. Yes, it was an event. They rolled back the wall behind our table to reveal another room that made me think Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and then proceeded to light the center table on fire.

I love a dessert that entertains too. There were dark chocolate and white chocolate fountains with fruit and cakes and even rice krispie treats for dipping, there was homemade Belgian waffles with ice cream and toppings, there was a candy bar and wedding cake and other confections and...much to my daughter's delight...there was a cotton candy station. So fun!

In fact, I think she may have filed something away in her brain for later too.


  1. Whoa! I'm so glad we have just the one daughter. . . For a whole lot of reasons. Cool wedding!

  2. Sounds like it would be a lot of fun! I don't think the pledge of allegiance would help me because it's too serious. I would need to recite something funny under my breath to keep from crying.

  3. Joyce,

    I love sneak peeks at what different people offer at their weddings. This one looks amazing and the food spectacular.

    I think the cotton candy made it all the more fun for kids and adults alike. Thanks so much for sharing this!

    Love and Hugs ~ Kat

  4. amazing wedding...i'm going to tuck that 'pledge' into my memory bank too!
    so glad you had fun
    beautiful ladies, all of them!!

  5. Beautiful pictures.

    As always, I'm listening intently to your counsel and advice on the years to come. With talk of college and marriage, I find myself wanting to put my fingers over my ears and say, "lalalalalalalala." It's my happy place, for now. ;)

  6. What a fantastic wedding. So many people today are doing so many wonderful things. I know people who have put a photo booth up and tables of candy. Fun! It is a very emotional day when it's your children getting married but if you love the person they are going to spend the rest of their life with it makes for an awesome day. I love how her father said that when he saw you guys the flood gates opened. How wonderful for your daughter to have such a great friend. You daughter looks beautiful.

  7. Wow! What a wedding. I want friends like that.

    As for keeping it together - just one more reason to pay them to elope!

  8. I even got tears in my eyes reading #4! Talking about the reception took my mind off of it, though! What an event!

  9. I love it when my daughter comes home from college...all the chicks back in the nest is my favorite thing...she won't get to come home until after football season and we sure do miss her...

    I am laughing about "facebook fakeout"...I have always noticed this discrepancy, but never new there was an actual term...

    I agree with life in the middle ages, PIllars was a great series, but seeing the living conditions on screen was pretty disgusting...makes me appreciate the blessing of soap!

    Your weekend sounded amazing! Thanks for sharing the wedding, good ideas to file away for sure....

  10. Sounds like you had a very busy, but fun-filled, weekend!

    I thought you were *suppose* to cry at weddings! (I think my dad was glad to get rid of one more. JK!)

  11. What a wedding. My daughter and her friend were talking about the candy bars being the big thing now. I was lucky we just had finger foods at my daughters. It was funny tho, someone told my daughter how wonderful it was and asked who catered it and she replied mom & me. They thought it was a new business in town asked for the phone number. And she said no my mom and me did everything. Quite the memory. It was quite sad with my daughters, I could not even help her with her dress, because when we looked at each other we both started crying. So she banned me from the room. lolol Memories...
    until next time... nel

  12. Wow, what a wedding reception. Glad you had such a fun weekend with #1. I always love a wedding of any kind, but this one was definitely one for the books.
    I was really worried about sobbing when my daughter walked down the isle, but I had prayed about it and God gave me the strength I needed to hold it together. Hubs was worried too, but he held it together coming down the isle and then got teary eyed as he walked back to sit with me. Funny you should mention the early years... as I saw Lauren walk down the isle with a big smile on her face, I could see her life flash before my eyes from birth until the present. Very emotional, but such a happy time too. It is just hard to explain. It's like having a baby, you can't understand it, until you have done it. If you cry, what the heck, it won't be the end of the world. I have never seen cotton candy served at a reception. Would be especially cute for an outdoor wedding. Love & blessings from NC!

  13. Well, I am certainly enjoying reading your blog posts and getting to know you and your family. Although I am a mother of grown sons, I certainly can identify with the pleasure a mother and father feel when their children come to visit for an extended stay. Now that they have families of their own and we are living overseas, it is a thing of the past (sigh). Your comments regarding the boys conversation was enlightening. They're right you know--Facebook photos are often intentionally misleading. I also was touched by the father's reaction to having eye contact with you. God bless him. That wedding had something for everyone! Your photos express your family's joy!

  14. I've never BEEN to a wedding like that but I've watched a few on TV. I think the show is called Platinum Weddings!

  15. Even though I don't know you (I just saw the title of this post with your comment on another blog and felt like I HAD to read it), I totally enjoyed this post.

    I so related to the feelings about adoring & reveling in a grown child's visits home, and I so wanted to smack those non-stop-not-so-kind boys behind you at the baseball game. Typically I enjoy all kinds of weddings.